


Julance 2020

by Bang Bang Beef Keef (BangBangBeefKeef)



Series: Oneshot Collections [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Additional Tags in Individual stories, Angst, DWDK does Julance, Fluff, Humour, JuLance, JuLance Challenge 2020, Julance 2020, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:08:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 29,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25022932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BangBangBeefKeef/pseuds/Bang%20Bang%20Beef%20Keef
Summary: Series of one shots based on the Julance 2020 prompts. Not planning on doing the whole month. Might just be a few.Chapter 1 -  BlueChapter 2 - The Seduction of Thunderstorm DarknessChapter 3 - preview of pole dance auChapter 4 - Boys in BikinisChapter 5 - EssentialChapter 6 - Welcome HomeChapter 7 - Space WhaleChapter 8 - Office AUChapter 9 - Part One of CountdownChapter 10 - Part Two of CountdownChapter 11 - UniformChapter 12 - Black (sequel to Blue)
Relationships: Adam & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Series: Oneshot Collections [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1816681
Comments: 132
Kudos: 358
Collections: Klasix Master Collection





	1. Day One: Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Teen  
> Wordcount: 836  
> Summary: As Keith leaves to join the Blades, Lance can't help feeling Blue  
> Additional Tags: Canonverse, First Kiss, Confessions
> 
> Song: Blue by Marina and the Diamonds
> 
> "Gimme love, gimme dreams, gimme a good self esteem  
> Gimme good and pure, what you waiting for?  
> Gimme everything, all your heart can bring  
> Something good and true  
> I don't wanna feel blue anymore (Blue)"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

_ “It could take weeks, maybe months to pull off, but if there is a chance we have… I have to take it. I need to be on that mission.” _

*******************************************************************************************************

“So that’s just it?!”

Keith turns away from the ship he’s packing his few possessions into to see Lance standing a few feet behind him. Keith would be happy to see Lance had followed him if it weren’t for how livid he looks.

“You’re just out? No goodbye?”

“I said goodbye,” says Keith, jumping down to the hangar floor.

“Oh yeah, a nice general ‘I’m leaving’ to the entire group and, let’s face it, mostly directed at Shiro…” Lance is actually pouting. 

“So you wanted me to say - ?” begins Keith, but he’s cut off by Lance working himself back into his rage.

“How can you just leave this? You found the Blue Lion, Keith! You! And Black chose you to lead us! What about duty? What about destiny? What about -?”

“Destiny chose too many people!” says Keith, his voice loud enough to echo through the hangar. When the echo dies he adds quietly, “You did the math yourself.”

“So this is because of what I said?” Lance’s eyes grow wide. “Keith, the last thing I was trying to do was drive you away from the team. I don’t want this to be my fault. You can have my spot! You can take Red! You can -”

Keith meant to just calm Lance. To reassure him that the value he holds on the team, Keith could never match. He meant to just say this to him. He wasn’t intending to kiss him.

But he does.

He cuts Lance off by kissing him.

Keith wants it to be sweet and tender, but he doesn’t have much experience with these things. He kisses Lance, but… Lance doesn’t kiss back. So he accepts that and steps back. 

“I’m sorry…,” says Keith, quietly. “There was probably a natural progression of things that could’ve led to that if I were staying. I shouldn’t have skipped ahead -”

But now Keith’s the one being cut off as Lance grabs the front of his Blade uniform and pulls him into a kiss.

And it’s more than soft and it’s more than tender. It’s Lance. Lance making Keith’s heart ache. If this is Lance’s latest argument for staying then it’s working.

Then as quickly as it starts, it ends with Lance shoving him back off. The fire from before returning a little as he scolds Keith, “That should’ve happened on it’s own time! At least… that’s where I thought we were heading… I need to go slowly, Keith. You know that about me.”

“I do know you’re slow,” agrees Keith.

“Hey!” snaps Lance.

“I’m sorry,” repeats Keith and as they speak they inch back in until their foreheads are pressed together. “I wanted to get… to this.”

“This… this is nice,” says Lance, resting his hands on Keith’s hips and that is indeed nice.

“The mission though,” says Keith, “It’s bigger than us.”

“You don’t know what’s bigger than me!” counters Lance and Keith can feel the heat of the blush radiating off his face. “We’re months of progress away from you knowing how big I am.”

Keith cracks up laughing. He definitely didn’t mean it that way and he’s sure Lance knew that.

“So that’s it?” demands Lance. “You just impregnate me and leave?”

“Wait -what?!” gasps Keith, stumbling backwards.

Lance’s laugh is loud and sharp, filling up the hangar. “Wow. You don’t know math  _ or _ science if you fell for that. Who will explain math and science to you if not for me?”

“Normally Pidge but…” Keith is still getting his beating heart under control.

“Okay, but who’s going to tell you when you’re wrong?” says Lance, crossing his arms. “Because you’re wrong a lot, Keith! And impulsive! And hotheaded!”

“I’m going to miss you too,” says Keith, stepping back up to Lance and trying out putting his hand on his hips. It’s also nice. Lance’s thoughts, always so transparent on his face, shift from scolding to shy as Keith continues, “I found Blue, but you flew her. You’re the best number two no matter who’s the leader.”

Lance’s eyes shine as his eyebrows turn up and his arms so naturally drape over Keith’s shoulders. “Yeah, but I wanna follow you… I’ve been doing it since we were kids. I don’t know if you noticed.” His voice breaks as he says, “Don’t go where I can’t keep following.”

“We’ll see each other again soon. I promise.” He leans in and kisses Lance once more, this time finding he can be as soft and tender like he always wanted to be.

Lance pulls back long enough to say the single word, “Months…”

It won’t really be months. That’s what Keith promises himself as he kisses Lance one last time and climbs into his ship. Big blue eyes watch him fly out of the hangar, away from something Keith wants almost as much as he wants to end this way and find his Galra family.

And he’s right… it won’t be months…

It’ll be years...


	2. Day Four: Monsters & Mana aka the Seduction of Thunderstorm Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 7893  
> Summary: Taking a night off from the journey back to Earth, Coran ropes everyone into a game of Monsters & Mana: travel edition! What he doesn't anticipate is Lance twisting the game into Pike seducing Thunderstorm Darkness in order to get information out of him.  
> Additional Tags: Canonverse, Early Season Seven setting, I was in a weird mood when I wrote this, background-threatening-to-become foreground Romellura, Keith/Lance and Allura/Romelle are really horny, trans-Romelle, one instance of amab language for Romelle, TW for anyone who cringes at the word p*ssy (talking about Keith) as I use it twice, depictions of anal fingering, depictions of anal sex, voyeurism
> 
> Song for day 4: 12345sex by Upsahl
> 
> "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6  
> 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, sex on my mind  
> High on all the ways  
> You're whispering my name  
> Go play me like a game"  
> Spotify Playlist: [Julance 2020](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please reread the tags carefully!

The journey to the Paladins’ homeplanet of Earth promised to be a long one and so far it feels longer. They’re barely a Skagnobble throw across a Blitavian Swarn Field along in progress along the map, still, Coran can recognize the signs of the space stir crazies in their small band of travelers. That’s why when he locates a nearby planet with breathable atmos, he recommends a night spent with their feet on the ground.

“Real in person people!” cheers Lance when he exits the Red Lion. Coran can no longer refer to him as Number Three since Number Four returned from the Blades taller than Number Four and now the entire numbering system based on height has broken down.

Lance does a lap hugging everyone hello while Romelle follows him out of Red and loudly complains about not being considered “real in person people.”

When Lance reaches Coran for a hug, he nearly knocks him over. It’s nice though. Lance gives good hugs. Coran has noticed that out of all the Earthlings, Lance is the most ‘touchy feely’ of the group.

Lance releases Coran from the tight hug and spins around to hug the next person only to freeze and throw his hands up when he realizes it’s Keith.

“Oh...hey Keith,” says Lance, his tone going flat as he scratches the back of his head.

“Nice to see you both face to face,” says Coran, clapping his hands down on both of their shoulders. “Now, what do you men say to a game night, hmmm?”

*******   
  
“Presenting… Monsters and Mana: travel edition!” Coran gestures across the board that’s hovering in the center of the group. They’ve pulled up rocks, stumps, and fallen tree trucks to use as seats in a circle.

“Oh sweet! We still get to play!” cheers Pidge. “I thought the game went down with the Castleship.”

“The larger version did,” says Coran, pulling out his pocket sized M&M book, “However, I packed the travel version before we left and I downloaded the latest game save onto your character cards.”

“How is a game that includes a book supposed to be fun?” asks Romelle.

“I asked the same thing,” says Lance, “But trust me, it’s fun. Even when Shiro tries to force us to learn things.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna patrol,” says Krolia, standing up.

“Are you sure?” asks Coran.

“Affirmative,” says Krolia, already walking off. The comic wolf gets up and trots after her.

“Aren’t you going to make the same excuse?” Lance asks, turning his head to stare at Keith.

“What do you mean?” asks Keith.

“Just that it’d be very like you to go off… on your own… without the team.... with your mom… for two years.”

“That happened one time,” protests Keith.

“You going off happened a lot.”

“I’m not going anywhere tonight,” argues Keith.

“Fine then,” snaps Lance. “Play the game with us.”

“I’m going to!”

“Excellent!” says Coran, speaking loudly in his Game Master voice. “Like I said, I saved your character.” He hands out the character cards.

Hunk leans over to look at Shiro’s character card and says, “Let me guess. You’re going to be a Paladin. Again.”

“Well, actually that wasn’t Shiro,” Pidge points out.

“It was his clone,” confirms Allura.

“Wow. So you’ve never played Monsters and Mana before,” gasps Hunk.

“Actually I… I remember the clone’s memories,” says Shiro. “As well as my time in the infinite void. Like the memories overlap each other.”

Everyone stares at Shiro, silent.

“Maybe we should move on from attempting to digest that freakiness,” suggests Lance.

“I don’t think I want to be a Paladin this time,” says Shiro, shifting uncomfortably.

“Eh, you can make up a new character if you wish,” says Coran, “but you’ll lose all your progress. And your inventory of course.”

Shiro’s eyes grow wide. “But… that’s my stuff. I want to keep my stuff!”

“Then stay a Paladin,” says Coran. He picks two blank character cards out of the box and passes them down. “Romelle, Keith, you’ll need to make up characters.”

“Pfffft,” snorts Lance.

“What’s that about?” shoots Keith, narrowing his eyes at Lance.

“Just the thought of you using your imagination. You’ll probably call your character Keith Blade or something basic like that.”

“To be fair though,” says Allura, “Shiro used his own name for his character as well.”

“Do you think my last name is Blade?” asks Keith, staring at Allura.

“What’s a last name?” she asks, blinking in confusion.

“Oh yeah…,” says Pidge, looking at Allura. “You don’t have a last name do you?”

“Full confession,” says Hunk, looking guilty, “I also don’t know Keith’s last name and at this point I’m too embarrassed to ask.”

“What are you talking about?” asks Pidge. “Keith’s last name is Shirogane.”

“What?” gasp Shiro and Keith together.

“Do you think they’re married?” cries Lance, throwing an arm out towards the former and current Black Paladins.

“No, they’re brothers,” says Pidge. She looks to Keith and Shiro who don’t confirm this. “Aren’t you?”

“I have heard you two say you’re brothers,” says Allura, pointing an accusing finger between them.

“We don’t mean that literally,” says Keith. “And you have met my mom!” He throws out an arm to the darkness where Krolia was last seen. Distant thunder and lightning crack on the horizon.

“I don’t know that she’s not also Shiro’s mother,” argues Allura. “I’ve met her in person only thrice before this.”

“I thought you were brothers from another mother,” says Pidge, throwing her hands up. “Prove me wrong.”

“Humans all look the same,” says Romelle, sounding bored, “You could all be related, I wouldn’t knoa.”

“Wait wait wait wait wait wait,” says Lance leaning over Allura so he can speak directly into Romelle’s face. “You think Hunk and Pidge look like they’re related?” \

Romelle looks over at Hunk and Pidge then shrugs. “They have the same ears.”

“WHAT IS IT WITH ALTEANS AND EARS?!” bellows Lance.

Suddenly everyone is yelling at once. “You said you were brothers!” “I don’t want to be a Paladin, I just wanna keep my inventory!” “No one told me Keith’s last name and I still don’t know!”

Coran is just about to yell ‘ENOUGH’ and bail on the whole game night idea when Keith stands up and shouts, “I AM THUNDERSTORM DARKNESS!” He holds out his character card with a straight arm and sweeps it around so everyone can see. “AND I AM A BARBARIAN!”

There’s silence for a beat then Lance snickers. “Did you just name yourself after things you could see?”

“Better than your character’s name,” says Keith, sitting back down on the log they’re sharing as a bench. “Pike?” he says, looking over at Lance’s card. “As in another word for lance? And you’re what? A thief?”

“I’m a ninja assassin, okay?”

“Your card says ‘thief’ and what is that drawing of your character? What are you a cat boy?”

“I’m not a cat boy!” protests Lance, getting worked up. “I’m a fox!”

“That’s clearly a kitty cat tail.”

“Very well,” says Coran, before they can keep the argument going. “Romelle what do you want to be?”

“A Paladin!” she says excitedly.

“We have a paladin, pick something else.”

“Oh I don’t know,” says Romelle, scrolling through the character options on her card. “Oh, is a bard a singer?”

“Of sorts,” says Coran.

“I’ll be that one and my name shall be…” Romelle’s eyes drift around the circle then fall on Lance. “Greenjacket.”

“And no last name for the Altean…” mumbles Lance.

“Oh yeah,” says Keith leaning in close to Lance. “And Pike’s last name is…?”

Lance’s mouth twists up as Keith stares directly into his eyes. Finally Lance says, “Grey...eyes.”

“Greyeyes?” repeats Keith, leaning back out of Lance’s space. “Pike Greyeyes? As in you looked me in the eye and then named yourself after my eyes?”

“You heard me! Shut up! Let’s play already!”

_ “Where we left off in our last quest,” _ says Coran,  _ “You’d travelled to the sight of Shiro… no Jiro… no Hiro’s brother’s burned down monetary and battled the spirit of Asmotha and earned yourselves the favour of one question answered by the Gods.” _

“Which Hunk wasted on the perfect pizza recipe,” says Pidge, sounding unimpressed.

“No regrets,” says Hunk, “Though Coran didn’t know what pizza was and had to invent a recipe on the spot and when I tried to follow it in real life I set the kitchen on fire… twice, but still in the world of the game, it was worth it.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“Agree to disagree.”

“So where do we head next?” asks Allura.

“I say we head for higher ground and scout out the surrounding terrain,” says Keith.

“Now hold on,” says Coran, holding up a hand towards him. “Your character hasn’t been introduced yet.”

“Seriously?” groans Keith. “Where is my character?”

“Maybe he’s off on a space whale,” suggests Lance, bitterly.

“You need to let that go,” says Keith.

“Oh, I haven’t even begun to grasp that,” says Lance, throwing out his arms.

“Okay, how about I say we look for lights in hopes of spotting a village,” says Shiro.

“Actually, I’m the party leader,” says Pidge, “But yeah, I do what Shiro suggests.”

Coran hands Pidge the die and she rolls.

“That looks fun,” says Romelle, “When do I get to roll it?”

“You haven’t been introduced yet either.”

“Quizzak this is dull,” says Romelle, slumping against Allura.

*******   
Our heroes make it to a town when they finally do meet Greenjacket and Thunderstorm inside the tavern of the local inn.

_ “A bard plays lightly, touring the room with her lute,” _ describes Coran.

“I pay the Greenjacket to play Toss a Coin to your Witcher,” says Pidge.

“You’ll need a six or higher to make requests,” warns Coran. 

Pidge rolls an eight as Romelle says, “I don’t know what she’s talking about.”

_ “At the back sits the famed barbarian Thunderstorm Darkness. You recognize his likeness by his purple skin and curved horns.” _

“I never said my skin was purple,” says Keith, looking at his character card, “Is this a Galra thing?”

Uncomfortable, Coran clears his throat and keeps speaking.  _ “If the translation of the amulet is to be believed, Thunderstorm is in possession of the name of Dakin’s Master.” _

“Wait, he has information? Why can’t I have information?” asks Romelle.

“B-because you chose to be a bard! You’re Thunderstorms travelling companion but you’re not privy to all his barbarian secrets.”

“I approach Thunderstorm and introduce myself,” says Allura, “and kindly ask him to reveal the information he has.”

_ “The mysterious archer Valayun approaches Thunderstorm’s table. She introduces herself and the name sparks some recognition in him. She quickly and abruptly asks him who Dakin was working for while adding.” _

“Well, I don’t think I was abrupt,” says Allura, crossing her arms in a pout.

_ “She adds a please and thank you.” _

“Thank you,” repeats Allura.

“Keith?” says Coran.

“Uh… I don’t give it to her?”

“C’mon man!” snaps Pidge.

“Hey, Keith’s just playing the game,” says Shiro. “Maybe it’s not on his character sheet that he’s trusting.”

“Oh he is definitely full of secrets,” hisses Lance.

“You’ll need to roll a three or higher to rebuff Valayun,” says Coran.

Keith rolls a three. “Did I do that right?”

“Did you roll the die right?” teases Lance.

“Sorry, Valayun. No information from asking politely. Lance, it’s your turn.”

“So Keith has the information?” asks Lance.

“Thunderstorm, yes.”

“But he doesn’t give it out easily?”

“From what you just watched, your knowledge of his character his he’s suspicious of newcomers.”

“And Romelle is playing some dork song?”

“Am I?” asks Romelle.

“It’s not dorky,” protests Pidge.

“And there’s candlelight?” asks Lance.

“In the tavern,’ says Coran, “Yes. That’s how they light it.”

“Okay,” says Lance, internally making up his mind about something. “I seduce Thunderstorm.”

“What?!” cries Keith, his whole body stiffening.

“Don’t take it personally,” says Pidge.

“Lance tries to seduce every NPC in the game,” adds Allura. “Really slows down gameplay.”

“I am not an NPC!”

“True,” says Coran, “Which will make this more interactive.”

“So what do I need to roll to get this one into one of the rooms upstairs?” asks Lance, his voice taking on that deeper purr he usually reserves for girls or NPCs.

“We’ve been over this before, Lance,” scolds Coran. “You can’t just attempt to seduce someone.”

“Oh right.”

Keith let’s out a sigh as his body relaxes.

“You have to take it one step at a time.”

Lance nods. “I put my arm around Thunderstorm and wink.”

“No,” says Keith. “I push his arm off.”

“Keith, you’ll need to roll at least a two to rebuff him.”

“Fine,” says Keith, taking the die. He rolls a one. “How?!”

Lance slings an arm around Keith’s shoulders. “That’s a pretty weak roll,” he says then winks at Keith.

Keith looks to Coran. “I can push him off in real life, right?”

“Up to you.”

Keith picks up Lance’s hand and removes his whole arm from his shoulders like he’s removing something gross.

_ “Pike throws an arm around Thunderstorm’s shoulders and give him a saucy wink.” _

“I put my hand on his knee,” says Lance.

“Hey!” snaps Keith.

“If you want to reject him, Keith, you’ll need a two again.”

“Again?” says Allura. “That seems low.”

“His flirtation level is only at a level one.”

“Never mind. That’s accurate then.”

Keith rolls a one. “Quiznak.”

Shiro, Hunk, and Pidge sigh in unison.

“Lance, can you seduce Keith quicker?” asks Hunk. “We wanna get the name of Dakin’s master.”

“Hold on,” says Lance. “I can’t just take his pants off in the middle of the tavern… wait can I?” Lance looks to Coran.

“What?!” shrieks Keith.

“No, you’ll need to get him up to a room first,” says Coran. “He’s unnaturally modest for a barbarian.”

“What?!”

“This is boring!” moans Romelle. “Just take your pants off, Keith, and get on with it.”

“What is happening in this game?!” whines Keith.

“I invite Keith up to my room,” says Lance.

“I’m not doing that. He can have the information,” says Keith. “I’ll tell him Dakin’s master’s name.”

“Hmmm unlikely your character would give that up,” says Coran. “You’ll need to roll a twenty.”

Keith rolls a one. “How does this keep happening? Is this a trick die?”

“Let me try,” says Romelle, snatching it out of Keith’s hand. She rolls a twenty. “That was easy.”

“You got lucky,” says Keith. Romelle rolls a twenty three more times before Keith takes the die back.

“I invite Keith to my room again,” says Lance, “Er… Thunderstorm Darkness. I mean I invite Thunderstorm Darkness.”

“Keith, you need to -” begins Coran.

“Roll a two or higher - I know! I know!” Keith rolls a one and up to Pike’s room at the Inn they go.

“I kiss Thunderstorm,” says Lance.

Keith rolls a one.

_ “Pike leans in and presses his lips to Thunderstorm’s lavender coloured ones. Fingers slips into hair black as coal…” _

“I slip him some tongue,” says Lance, tenting his fingers in front of his face.

“Why?” cries Keith.

“Because I need to heat this kiss up!” snaps Lance.

Keith rolls a one…The kiss heats up.

_ “Pike peaks his tongue out, exploring. Thunderstorm parts his lips, allowing Pike’s tongue to enter his mouth. He sweeps it through, then finds Thunderstorm’s tongue and massages it with his own.” _

Keith buries his redding face in his hands..

Lance has a look of concentration on his face. “I back him up against the bed and push him down.”

“Roll for how hard you push him,” says Coran.

Keith raises his head up from his hands. “Don’t I get a chance to rebuff him?!”

“Shhh,” says Coran. “Not your turn.”

Lance rolls a two.

_ “You lowersThunderstorm lovingly down onto the bed, taking care so that his back meets the mattress with a light bounce before you lower your own body on top of his.” _

“I take off his belt,” says Lance.

“How is it not my turn?!” barks Keith.

“You know what,” says Pidge, standing up. “This is quickly heading towards something I’m too young to overhear so maybe just summon me on the comms when we get back to the quest… if we get back to the quest.”

Shiro stands up as Pidge walks off. “I’m also not… not wanting to hear where this is going.”

“Shiro, please don’t leave me,” begs Keith.

“Sorry Keith. I don't want to have to hear my brother being… deflowered.”

“Ah ha!” cries Allura, pointing at Shiro, “You admit he’s your brother!”

Shiro leaves with a shake of his head.

Coran puts his mind back in the story.  _ “Pike lowers himself to his knees on the floor and reaches towards the belt holding on Keith’s animal pelts…” _

“Obviously, I stop him,” says Keith before he rolls a one again.

_ “Pike’s talented thief hands make short work of the buckle. Without the constraint of the thick leather belt, Thunderstorm’s pelts fall open, exposing his undergarments underneath.” _

Keith presses his fists into his forehead. His knees bounces, nervously.

“I remove his panties,” says Lance, his voice a purr again.

“I’m not wearing panties!” barks Keith as he spins on Lance.

“Prove it!” says Lance, looking down at those black canvas leggings Keith always wears.

“My eyes are up here!” says Keith, taking Lance’s face between his hands and lifting it back up to look at his own face.

“Such a contrast between the slow seduction of their characters and the heat of their real life personas,” says Allura, tipping her head to the side as she considers Keith and Lance.

“I agree,” says Romelle. “I’m not sure the game has them in character.”

“Thank you,” says Keith.

“They’d most likely be tearing each other’s clothes off if they were like the real Keith and Lance.”

“Hey!” says Keith, turning on Romelle.

“Coran, maybe check your stats on them,” suggests Romelle.

“Hold on,” says Coran, thumbing through his mini Monsters and Mana book. “I’m trying to figure out the probability of Thunderstorm Darkness wearing panties.” He finds the page he wants then rolls. “Panties it is!”

“I’m not playing anymore,” says Keith, standing up.

“Fine then!” says Lance, standing up. “You lose the game. So give us the info!”

“No!” says Keith, stepping right up to Lance and getting in his face. “That name dies with me.” 

“You can’t do that! Coran, can he do that?”

“If you leave the game, Keith, you’ll have to reveal the name first,” says Coran. “It’s only fair. The quest can’t continue without it. I’ve built the story around it, you see.”

“Fine,” says Keith, sitting back down.

“Oh good,” says Hunk, “You’ll give us the name and I can call the others back and our quest can start.”

“No, I won't,” says Keith then he turns to Lance and says, “I take off Pike’s belt.” Lance’s face twists up in reaction and Keith grins back at him. “You hear that? Two can play at that game! Tables turned! Booyeah!”

“Yeah I’m…,” Hunk stands up, fumbling with his words, “I can’t do this. I’m out. Allura? Romelle?”

“Hmm?” they hum in unison. They’ve scooted together, grasping each other’s hands while staring at Keith and Lance who are currently in a staring contest.

“Nevermind. Coran, you wanna get out of here before this gets too real and we can’t ever erase it from our memories?”

“Pffft I’m in the middle of game,” says Coran, shooing Hunk off. “Now where were we? Ah yes, Thunderstorm removes Pike’s belt…. Unless you stop him. Lance?”

“Naw. I help him,” he says, never stopping his intense eye contact with Keith.

“You’ll need to roll at least a five to help.”

Without looking Lance takes the die and rolls. It’s a seven.

_ “Fumbling in the heat of the moment, together you remove Pike’s belt.” _

“Wait! What happened with the panties?” asks Romelle.

“We established Keith is wearing some,” says Allura, “But is Lance going to take them off?”

“You mean is Pike going to remove Thunderstorm’s panties?” clarifies Coran.

“Sure sure sure,” agrees Allura.

“It’s actually Keith’s turn,” points out Coran.

“I remove Pike’s panties,” says Keith, crossing his arms across his chest.

Coran bristles. “Gssscht! You can’t remove his panties yet! He’s still dressed!”

“I was down to my panties after removing my belt, how is that fair?” argues Keith.

“You were only wearing pelts! You’re a Barbarian! Check your character cards! You have very different ensembles!”

They lean into each other’s shoulders so they can look at each other’s cards. “What?” gasps Keith. “What are all these layers? You have a scarf, a vest, a tunic, pants, and… what are those? Wrappings on your arms and legs?”

“Guess you’ve got your work cut out for you,” hums Lance directly in Keith’s ear.

“Fine,” says Keith, turning to look at Coran. “I remove his pants.”

“Not without removing his shoes first, me thinks,” corrects Coran.

Keith scowls. “I remove his shoes!”

“I suck Thunderstorm’s nipple,” says Lance.

“I am not done undressing you!” says Keith, spinning on Lance.

“Maybe not, but it’s my turn.” Lance looks at Coran. “I suck his nipple.”

“Which one?” asks Coran.

Lance’s eyes shift down to Keith’s chest. “Mmmm righty.”

“Rolling for pleasure response,” says Coran, rolling the die. “You got a sixteen. That’s excellent.”

“Well done, Lance,” says Allura.

“Somebody likes nipple play,” says Lance, leaning back into Keith’s personal space.

“Can I remove his pants now?” Keith asks Coran.

“I dunno…,” purrs Lance. “Can you?”

Coran rolls. “You successfully remove Pike’s pants.”

“What’s he wearing underneath?” asks Romelle.

“Describe it in detail,” insists Allura.

Coran checks his mini m&m book then rolls the die.  _ “Oh… Thunderstorm pulls down Pike’s canvas pantaloons to reveal nothing underneath but his skin pike.” _

“Skin pike?” they all repeat then suddenly they all get it.

“I keep my best weaponry in mah pants,” says Lance, pointing at his crotch.

“Why are you going commando?” accuses Keith.

“Rolling for state of arousal,” says Coran. He rolls. “Twenty.”

“Fabulous,” says Allura.

“Well, done Lance,” agrees Romelle.

_ “Pike’s swollen member springs forth before Thunderstorm’s eyes.” _

“This got to be too much too quickly,” groans Keith.

“Rolling for Thunderstorm’s arousal reaction…,” says Coran, shaking the die in his hand.

“What?!” cries Keith.

“Twenty,” says Coran, eyebrows raising at the sight of the number on the die. _ “Thunderstorm becomes fully erect.” _

“I am not!” argues Keith. “I mean… my character is not!”

“This is the game, Keith,” says Lance. “You’re the one who took my pants off, this is on you.” He turns back to Coran. “I’m going to suck his left nipple next. It needs attention. Oh, but, can I lie on top of him and grind against him at the same time?”

“Yes, but you’ll need to roll a twelve or higher for coordination.”

Lance rolls a fifteen.

_ “Pike climbs on top of Thunderstorm, pinning his wrists against the mattress, he forms a tight seal around his left nipple, giving it a firm suck. As his tongue sweeps across the nub of Thunderstorm’s dark purple nipple, he grinds his silent flute against his leg…  _ Rolling for pleasure response. It’s a twenty…  _ Thunderstorm moans lewdly, his own lightning rod leaks into the thin fabric of his panties.” _

“Quizzak me…,” mumbles Romelle.

Keith has drops his head between his knees, his one knee jumping with nervous energy.

“Ready to quit the game and give up that info?” asks Lance, throwing an arm across Keith’s shoulder.

Keith raises back up and looks intensely at Lance. “Not on your life!” He turns back to Coran. “It’s my turn right? What can I do? Remove his scarf?”

“Oh, just leave the quiznaking scarf on and take his silent flute into your mouth,” hisses Allura.

Romelle raises her hand. “I shout, ‘Suck his flute!’ at them.”

Coran bristles again. “Gssstpft! You’re not even in this scene! You can’t make suggestions!”

“I’m watching from the window,” says Romelle.

“Me too,” says Allura, quickly. “We’re both at the window, watching.”

“But it’s the second story!” snaps Coran. “The window ledge won’t support your weights!”

“You don’t know that,” argues Allura.

“Yeah!” agrees Romelle. “Do the rolly thing to see if the ledge will hold.”

Coran rolls. “The ledge holds,” he says, surprised.

“Alright,” cheers Romelle, pumping her fist.

_ “In the window are two pairs of eyes. They belong to the mystical archer Valayun and the golden voiced bard Greenjacket who are watching from outside the open window.” _

“I wink at the ladies watching us in the window,” purrs Lance.

“It is not your turn!” snaps Keith. “Okay… I remove his scarf.”

“Nope. Don’t think so,” protests Lance. “If you recall, I pinned your wrists so unless you break free of my hold, you’re not doing anything this turn.”

Keith looks at Coran. “I break free of his hold.”

Keith rolls. He doesn't break the hold.

“How does that make sense?” argues Keith. “I’m a barbarian! He’s a thief! I’m obviously stronger than him.”

“I’m inclined to agree,” says Coran. “But the die says you don’t break free so I have to assume you’re letting him overpower you.”

“I am letting him do nothing,” hisses Keith.

“I subdue him with a kiss,” says Lance.

“Roll for kiss power,” says Coran. Lance rolls a nineteen.  _ “Pike kisses Thunderstorm with the power of a nineteen consorts, turning him into putty.” _ Coran looks at Keith. “I’m afraid this means you’ll be immobile for the next several turns.”

“How is that okay?” demands Keith.

“Lance, congratulations,” says Coran, ignoring Keith’s annoying habit of questions everything. “Your seduction level has jumped from level one to level five.”

“Cool!” says Lance, showing off the new stat on his character card.

“Allura and Romelle, since you’re in the scene now, you can each take a turn.”

“I watch,” says Allura, quickly.

“Am I able to play a mood setting song?” asks Romelle.

“It may be cramped on the ledge, but you can roll to see,” agrees Coran. She rolls. It’s good.  _ “The air is filled with the sweet tune drifting in the window.” _ Coran rolls.  _ “The romantic atmosphere increases threefold.” _

“Guys, am I crazy?” begins Lance, “Or are we creating something special here?”

“You’re crazy,” says Keith at the same time Allura and Romelle say, “Special.”

Coran shakes his head at Keith. “I am trying very hard here to be a good Game Master and tell a compelling story based on your moves. I admit I’m feeling little under appreciated from this...” Coran gestures towards Keith “...section of the circle.”

“Yeah Keith,” agrees Lance. “If you didn’t want things to get sexy as all hell, you shouldn’t have removed my pants and unleashed my lance of love. Don’t blame Coran for that. That’s on you.”

“Sorry Coran,” mumbles Keith.

“Apology accepted. Now, Lance, it is your turn.”

“I roll Thunderstorm onto his stomach,” says Lance.

“Ha! You let go of my wrists!” says Keith. “I push Pike on his back instead.”

Coran shakes his head. “Keith, you are still subdued by Pike’s kiss. Between that and Greenjacket’s song, you will be submissive for many turns to come.”

“I am not a sub!” says Keith, aggressively wagging his finger at Coran.

“Oh yeah,” says Lance, fluttering his eyelashes at Keith. “Why don’t you roll to see?”

“I don’t need to roll! I know my character!”

“Afraid you’re going to roll another one, huh? And then I get to do whatever I want with you for the rest of the game and I am going to draw… it… out…”

“Ahem,” says Coran. “If you two are done arguing, I’ll get back to the scene.  _ Thunderstorm is drowsy and content as Pike rolls him to his stomach with no resistance at all. He flops over, content to be used however Pike wants.” _

“I feel like you’re really overplaying it,” says Keith.

Is he? Well, it is possible Coran is feeling a little miffed and it might be slightly affecting his GM’ing…

“Allura, it’s -”

“I watch.”

“I play,” says Romelle.

“Keith’s turn is once again skipped. Lance?”

“I pull down his panties.”

“Yessss,” hisses Allura.

_ “Thunderstorm, ever complacent, hikes up his hips to allow Pike to slide the hem of his silky panties over the crest of his supple buttocks.” _

“I watch,” exhales Allura.

“I play,” says Romelle in the same tone of voice.

Keith buries his face in his hands again. “Just tell me when I get to move again.”

“I spread his cheeks apart, spit on his asshole, and rub it with my finger,” says Lance. 

_ “Delicate hands part Thundestorm’s cheeks. Pike takes a moment to admire the barbarian’s entrance before using his saliva to lubricate it. His skilled thief fingers make tiny circles around the entrance, circling in closer to his prize. _ ” Coran picks up the die. “Rolling for pleasure response… Nineteen.”

“Nice,” says Lance, pumping his fist. “What does he max out at?”

“Are you asking what it takes to make me cum?” asks Keith.

“Ew Keith, no. I’m talking about your character.”

“Yes, let’s keep it appropriate,” warns Coran. “We want everyone in this circle to remain comfortable.”

“Oh, I’m comfortable,” says Romelle squeezing Allura’s hand so tightly her knuckles pale.

“Good,” says Coran then he switches to his GM voice.  _ “Thunderstorm’s wriths against Pike’s touch. He moans out Pike’s name, begging for more than just this light touch.”  _ Coran looks to Allura. “Allu-”

“I’m watching, Romelle’s playing,” says Allura, interrupting him. “Skip our turns.”

“Yes, just keep skipping us,” agrees Romelle, waving him off with her free hand.

“Alright… Lance, your next move?”

“I don’t wanna know,” whines Keith, ducking his head down again.

Lance nods. “For this turn I… promise to give Thunderstorm what he wants if he gives up the name of Dakin’s master.”

Keith whips his head up. “You bastard!” he yells at the same time Allura and Romelle groan, “Quiznak” and “Quizzak,” respectively.

“What?” says Lance, defensively. “The whole point of this was to seduce the information out of you. I think I’m at the point where I can get it…”

“As if you’d just stop there,” snaps Keith.

“What do you want from me, Keith?” Lance argues back. “Do you want me to finger bang you until you nut all over the bed.”

“Yes,” whispers Allura.

Before Keith can respond, Lance twists back towards Coran and says, “Forget what I said. What I meant to say was, I finger his asshole. I finger it raw.” Then he turns back to the Black Paladin and says, “Happy Keith?”

“What do you - why would I - how could you -?” stutters Keith.

Coran clears his throat. “Can I recommend against the raw part? It’s not going to win you any favours with Thunderstorm, may reduce your seduction level, and may rouse Keith out of his submissiveness.”

“Yeah, it was just a figure of speech,” says Lance, “Obviously, I’m going to make it feel amazing and not hurt him at all.”

“Ah yes, but you must be more precise with your language,” states Coran. “I am not a mindreader.”

“No one wants to experience the inside of your head,” grumbles Keith, directing this towards Lance.

“Maybe not, but I’m going to experience the inside of your ass.”

Coran clears his throat.  _ “Pike sucks two of his fingers into his mouth, coating them with spit. He then pushes them into Thunderstorm’s entrance that accepts them, greedily. He thrusts them…”  _ Coran pauses to roll.  _ “... Seventeen times and draws out…” _ He rolls again.  _ “An obscene moan that from escapes Thunderstorm’s throat. Drools stains the bedding beneath his head.” _

“You’re getting so wet for me,” purrs Lance directly into Keith’s ear.

“Shut up,” says Keith.

“I keep going,” says Lance, directing this at Coran. “I keep going until he cums from my fingers.”

“Well it’s unlikely he would -” begins Coran, rolling the die as he speaks. “Oh look at that.  _ Thunderstorm unloads his seed onto the bed with a mighty shudder.” _

Allura squeaks, but slaps a hand over her mouth, muffling out the sound. Her legs pinch together at the same time.

Keith is just shaking his head while Lance looks at him smugly. “Fine. Just ask me for the name,” says Keith.

Lance claps his hands together then gives them a rub. “I top him. I top Thunderstorm.”

“No!” snaps Keith. “I don’t bottom him! He has to bottom!”

“I can’t bottom! I have a tail there!”

“Top?” repeats Coran. “Bottom?”

“You know…,” says Lance. He makes a finger gun with one hand then says, “Top...” Then the a-okay sign with the other hand. “Bottom…” Then he inserts the finger gun into the a-okay and demonstrates this motion over and over.

“Ah, I see. We used to call that hiding the Bungleshell inside the Jingledew,” says Coran, nodding. “At least that was back in the day with Alfor.” Then he realizes what he’s saying and turns to Allura, “That was in game play of course. Never in real life. Just our characters.” And that is more of less the truth…

Allura waves a hand overtop of her head and says, “I’m going to block out what was just said so I can continue to enjoy this.” She then gestures towards Keith and Lance.

“So I top, right?” asks Lance.

“No, I top,” says Keith. “I haven’t gotten to do anything in so many turns!”

“Um, excuse me, but I just gave you the nutting of your lifetime plus I stretched you out already.”

“Paladins please,” says Coran, trying to calm their latest squabble. “Let the die decide. Odd or even?”

“Odd,” say Keith and Lance in unison. They look at each other then say, “Even!”

Coran sighes. “Odd, even,” he says, pointing at Lance and Keith in turn. He rolls. “Eleven. Lance hides the Bungleshell in Keith’s Jingledew.”

They both look confused. Coran changes his language to sound more human. “Lance tops, Keith bottoms.”

“Yes,” cheers Lance and Romelle together.

“Boo,” whines Allura.

“That isn’t fair,” says Keith. “I might enjoy this more if I got to top.”

“What I’m hearing is you’re enjoying this some,” purrs Lance, leaning his shoulder to press against Keith’s.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Hey,” says Lance, putting a hand on Keith’s knee. “I’m going to take care of you. And if it goes well, maybe you get a turn next…”

Keith’s face is red when he crosses his arms and says, “Okay, but you are not using spit as lube. I deserve real lube.”

“Inventory check,” declares Lance, pulling out his character card with his hand that isn’t squeezing Keith’s knee. “Okay, how does my character not carry lube?”

Keith, Romelle, and Allure pull out their cards and squint at them. 

“I don’t have lube either,” says Keith.

“How barbaric of you,” snickers Lance, getting a smile out of Keith.

“Oh!” says Allura, raising her hand. “I have anointing oil. Will that work?”

Coran sucks in air through his teeth and shakes his head. “Causes blisters analy I’m afraid.” He knows from real life experience.

“Hold on,” says Romelle. “I have a ‘succulent plant with thick leaves that are filled with a vitamin rich gel known for it’s soothing and healing properties on skin.’”

“Very good, Romelle,” praises Coran. “I have used that Allie plant as lubricant in many a quest.” And one or twice in real life, but he doesn’t need to mention that.

“I huck the plant in through the window,” says Romelle proudly.

“Roll for accuracy of aim,” says Coran. It’s good.  _ “An Allie plant is thrown in through the window by Greenjacket and lands on the bed.” _

“Now we’re cooking,” says Lance, rubbing his hands together.

Coran helps Lance and Keith figure out how to extract the gel from the Allie plant. 

“I spread a generous amount on my cock,” says Lance.

“Your…?” repeats Coran. Allura and Romelle look at Lance, confused.

“You know my ‘silent flute,’” says Lance, wiggling two fingers on both hands.

“It’s an Earth term for it,” says Keith.

“Ah, I see,” says Coran. “In Altean culture we do try to avoid actual terms for our…” Coran circles his lap with his hands.

“It’s true. I don’t have a -” she gestures back to Lance.

“Cock,” he says.

“And I really don’t know a human would call what I do have,” continues Allura with a frown.

“Pussy,” suggests Lance.

Keith shakes his head. “No, that’s the worst word for it.”

“I like it though,” says Allura, her eyes lighting up. “It’s so cute, that word… Pussy.”

“I love that for you,” says Romelle, squeezing Allura’s arm. “Maybe I’ll call mine a cock then and we’ll both have human terms for our...” Romelle gestures to her lap.

“Yes, you should!” agrees Allura, giggling.

“Ah yes well,” stammers Coran. “Let’s keep the talk to game play and keep ourselves and our… parts out of it. Assuming you ladies are watching, Keith, it is your turn.”

“Oh, I’m active again?” asks Keith.

“Unless you want to roll for submission again,” suggests Coran.

“No,” says Keith with a shake of his head. “I push Pike onto his back and ride him like a bicycle.”

“Whoa,” says Lance, looking at Keith, impressed. “Welcome to the game, Thunderstorm.”

“What’s a bicycle?” asks Coran.

“Your move was too generalized,” says Lance, speaking to Keith. “May I suggest wording it like. You push me onto my back, line up my cock with your hole and sink down onto it.”

Keith nods then looks at Coran. “Okay, I do that.”

_ “The barbarian takes control,”  _ says Coran,  _ “rolling the thief onto his back and straddling his legs. Thunderstorm pushes Pike’s tunic up to expose his abdomen. He lifts up his own hips and crawls forward. Taking Pikes *cock* in one hand he lines him up with his entrance. He then lowers himself down, taking Pike inside of him with one smooth glide, the lubricant easing his motion so they fit together, perfectly matched.” _

Coran turns to Allura and Romelle to ask them what they want to do with their turns, but they both snap, “We’re just watching!” before he can open his mouth.

“Very well, Lance?”

“I’m gonna roll for submission here and let Keith take the lead.” Lance rolls a four for a temporary reprieve from his turns. “Keith, this is your show now.”

Keith gets that determined look Coran has seen on his face only during missions. “I bounce on his cock.”

All eyes turns to Coran. Okay, he can improve on that.  _ “Thunderstorm pushes up Pike’s tunic further until his nipples are visible. He rests his palms on Pike’s pecs and presses forward, leaning his weight onto his hands so he can raise up his hips then drop them back down.”  _

Coran stops to roll for pleasure response from Lance.  _ “Pike moans, arching his back to press his hips up, wanting Thunderstorm to take more than his fill. Thunderstorm clucks his tongue, disapproving before raising his hips so high Pike nearly slips out. Pike whines and pouts until Thunderstorm drops his hips down again, taking in Pike’s cock completely. He does this over and over, the springs of the inn’s bed squeaking with weight of the battle-worn warrior as he takes what he wants from the well endowed thief.” _

“And then what happens?” whispers Romelle.

Coran looks to Keith.

“I lean down and kiss him,” says Keith, shifting himself on the log closer to Lance.

“Aw thanks for the romance man,” says Lance, shifting just the same so their sides touch.

_ “Thunderstorm moves his hands to meet Pike’s above his head. He leans down and kisses him passionately, their tongues meeting in a dance as their fingers intertwine…”  _ Coran looks to Lance.

Everyone leans in towards Coran as if expecting him to continue. Realizing the miscommunication he says, “Lance, your submissive has worn off. You may take a turn or roll for submission again.”

“Um,” says Lance, biting his lip as he turns to meet Keith’s eyes. His hand rubs up and down Keith’s thigh as he ponders this. “I’m going to take my turn and hike up my knees so I can begin thrusting into him. If uh… that works for you.”

“Sure,” shrugs Keith before dropping a hand on top of Lance’s.

_ “One at a time, Pike puts his feet flat to the bed, hiking up his knees to shift the angle of his penetration. Free to move now, he thrust his hips up, hitting Thunderstorm deeper than ever before _ .” Coran rolls for pleasure response. _ “Thunderstorm groans into Pike’s mouth, eager to show off his approval for this position change.” _

“Skip us,” says Romelle before Coran has a chance to ask. “Skip us forever.”

“Keith?”

“I rock on my knees,” says Keith, tugging Lance’s hand back until it sits at the top of his thigh. “And call out his name,” he adds with a soft blush.

_ “Thunderstorm rocks on his knees, matching Pikes rhythm so their bodies slap together over and over. Thunderstorm pushes up onto his hands, resting the palms by Pike’s shoulders. He cries out Pike’s name, repeating it over and over with every satisfying thrust. His pleasure mounting, sweat dripping from his brow.” _

Coran looks to Lance. “Well…,” says Lance as he lifts up Keith’s arm to drape it around his own shoulders then twists to hook his knees over Keith’s closest leg. “I grab him by the horns and grip them hard.”

_ “Pike takes Thunderstorm by the horns, gripping them hard to reign in his lover and take control of his movements. Thunderstorm growls, caught between an urge to rebel and the spiking of desire inside of him.”  _ Coran rolls the die.  _ “Finally he submits, allowing Pike full freedom to hold him in place as he thrusts -” _

“Can you say fucks?” asks Lance quickly. “It’s an Earth thing…”

Coran nods.  _ “Thunderstorm allows Pike to hold him in place as he *fucks* into his stretched and lubed entrance.” _ Coran picks up his book for a quick consult. When he looks back at the group he notices Lance is fully in Keith’s lap now. “At this point I think I should roll to check for climatic pleasure response,” suggests Coran.

“Yes!” cry four voices back at him. 

Coran rolls. It’s a twenty. Oh boy…

_ “Thunderstorm’s fangs bite his lips until he draws blood as pleasure rips through his body. His arms quiver, wishing to give out, but Pike’s strong arms force Thunderstorm to stay aloft, gripping tight on his horns. His body shakes, unable to escape from the stimulation that is unrelenting from Pikes thrusts. He tightens around Pike’s cock causing…” _

Coran rolls. It’s another twenty.

_ “...causing Pike to tip over into the realms of body awakening pleasure. His seed is plentiful, unleashing into Thunderstorm, making his entrance as soaked as a real storm. His thrusts go from steady and quick to slow and hard, the extra slickness making it impossible to resist continuing even when his body wants to give out from the stimulation and waves of fire overtaking him.  _

_ “When his arms can’t hold Thunderstorm up anymore he lets the weight of the barbarian drop of top of him, his fucking into him becomes slow shallow. He can feel the other’s heart pounding inside his own chest. Their bodies melt together as Pike finally stills, staying inside of Thunderstorm content, safe and warm.” _

“Lance,” says Coran, looking to the Red Paladin.

“Hmmm,” says Lance, lifting his head up from where he had been kissing along Keith’s neck.

“You know what you have to do.”

“Round two!” says Lance.

Coran shakes his head. “No. You’ve lowered Thunderstorms defenses. Now is the time to ask for the name.”

“Name?” repeats Lance, looking confused.

“The… information…. Dakin’s master.”

“Oh right the name,” says Lance, going to get up, but Keith pulls him down.

“Don’t get up yet,” whispers Keith.

“Uh…,” says Lance, settling back down into Keith’s lap. “I guess I ask for the name?”

“With Keith’s character so complacent you only need to roll a three or higher,” says Coran, handing Lance the die.

Lance rolls a one. They all stare at it.

“Well I suppose…,” says Coran. “You could lower Keith further down to a level two…”

“Round two!” cheers Lance.

“Yes!” cheers Allura. “I want the barbarian to go feral on the thief!” Coran looks at her. At some point she moved into Romelle’s lap without him noticing. “What?” says Allura, defensive. “I mean in the game, obviously.”

********   
  
There’s light on the horizon when Pidge, Hunk, and Shiro finally return to the game circle.

“I bask in the afterglow,” says Lance, with a yawn, his head rests on Keith’s shoulder as he’s cradled in Keith’s arms.

“I bask,” says Keith.

“I watch,” says Allura.

“I watch,” says Romelle.

_ “Pike rests his on Thunderstorm’s bare chest as they both bask in the afterglow of their love making. Valayun and Greenjacket watch from the window.” _

“Is this game still going?!” cries Pidge.

“Heeeeey, Pidgey!” says Lance, waving at her from Keith’s lap. “Good news! It took five tries and apparently the entire night, but I got Dakin’s master’s name from Keith. Now we can start our quest.”

“We’re not doing a quest now,” says Shiro. “It’s the morning. We’re heading back out into space.”

The four players and Coran all look at each other. “I guess we can save at this point for next time,” says Coran.

“I need half a varga before we take off,” says Keith standing up suddenly. He manages to take Lance to his feet with him, not letting go of his waist.

“Uh same,” says Lance, snatching the mini M&M book and holding it in front of his own lap. He looks down at it. “Dammit… why is it so small?”

“I need half a varga as well,” says Allura standing up as well and pulling Romelle to her feet. “In the Blue Lion.”

“I also… Blue Lion,” says Romelle.

And before anyone can question this they both take off at a sprint towards Blue.

“Yeah uh…” sputters Lance, but Keith has already taken off towards where they parked the Lions. Lance sprints after him without another word.

“They’re both heading towards Red,” says Hunk. “Did Keith forget he doesn’t fly Red anymore?”

“I think they know exactly where they’re going,” groans Shiro.

“Wanna bet those dummies forget to mute the Lion comms?” asks Pidge. 

“Hey,” says Krolia, returning from her night patron with the cosmic wolf trotting after her. “So did it get weirdly sexual really fast?”

“How did you know?” asks Pidge.

“It’s why I never play role playing games with people who are into each other. They always steer it in that direction. Plus I’m certain the die is swayed by hormones.”

“Hmmm,” says Coran, considering this as he packs up the hovering board. They didn’t really need the map this time… “I would be lying if I said I’d never had a similar experience in my youth, but it’s all part of the fun and I consider this a very successful night of questing even if the players only achieved objective one of my twenty-one objective story. We can always pick it up again where we left off.”

“No,” say Krolia and Pidge at the same time Shiro and Hunk say, “No thanks.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus: Keith and Lance definitely do forget to mute the Red Lion's comm. Allura and Romelle remember to mute Blue's mics, but go ahead and listen to Keith and Lance over the comm.
> 
> Now that you're done reading I can admit that Allura and Romelle were supposed to get weirded out and leave the moment things got sexual along with everyone else. I did not expect them to become horny voyeurs!!


	3. Day Nine: Bisexual Pride aka preview from pole dancer au

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Teen  
> Wordcount: 3247  
> Summary: Lance won an amateur dance competition and his prize is a free Burlesque Course at Altea Fitness, but Lance 'can't' go through with joining because he's always been shamed for his feminine interests. Luckily, instructor Adam is here to help Lance be more confident in who he is. And that means every aspect of Lance.  
> Additional Tags: modern au, dance studio setting, coming out, Langst but with a happy conclusion, sorry Keith's not in this one!
> 
> Song: Boys/Girls by Torry Mercer
> 
> "There's no sides, there's no right and wrong  
> I know where I belong  
> So don't tell me it won't be long  
> Just let me sing my own song!"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is part of a larger story and is the origins of Lance becoming a pole dance/burlesque instructor. It's a really personal story for me and I do want to start posting it eventually, but I have so many WIPs I should finish first. Plus when my computer died I lost large chunks of this fic so it's not like I have a lot to post anyway until I rewrite it *exhausted sobbing*
> 
> Anyway, I love writing Lance coming out!! I will write him coming out a million times over!! Here is one time he comes out in one reality!!

Adam remembered the summer showcase when Lance had won the Mr. Altea competition. The next day Adam had been heading in to teach a Level Six Pole class when Melenor had taken him by the arm and said, “I’ll cover your class. I need you to handle a divorce.”

“Divorce” was the Altea Fitness management keyword for when a student wanted out of a contract. Usually this entailed sitting down with them for a few minutes to find out the reasons behind this. If there was something the student wasn’t happy about, management wanted to try to change it before seeing someone walk away. Oftentimes it was a matter of affording their membership in which case there were discounts they could apply. 

It was meant to be a low pressure and Mel herself would admit that at times students seemed to back off after five minutes of sitting with her without any concerns being resolved. She was aware that students found her intimidating even when she wasn’t trying to be. She didn’t like feeling like she was forcing anyone to stay so she’d call in other management staff to deal with divorces.

“Can’t Roni do it?” asked Adam, “She’ll be back from her break in five and she’s just bookkeeping today.”

“I think you best handle this one. Use my office.”

When Adam walked in and saw Lance sitting in the chair in front of Mel’s desk, he understood why Melenor wanted him on this one.

“Hi Lance,” said Adam when the Cuban boy turned to look at him. “I’m Adam. We met last night.” He shook Lance’s hand.

“I remember. You kinda stand out.”

“I could say the same about you,” said Adam with a chuckle, heading around the desk to sit. “You really stole the show.” Once seated, Adam could see how that statement had made Lance shrink and cast his eyes down. Adam frowned and titled his head. “So what’s up, Lance?”

Lance went into the pocket of his army green jacket and pulled out a small piece of paper. He unfolded it gingerly on the desk. Adam didn’t need to read it to know what it was.

“This gift certificate you gave me –”

“Awarded to you,” corrected Adam. Lance flicked his eyes up to finally meet Adam’s. “You won it in competition. We didn’t give it to you.”

“Oh… well, I can’t use it.”

“Can’t?” Adam looked at Lance over the rim of his specs.

“Well, I don’t want to,” said Lance, shifting his eyes away. “I thought about it and doing Burlesque was okay for a laugh one night, but I’m never going to take a real course so maybe you can put the credit on one of my sisters’ accounts.”

Adam held Lance’s nervous gaze for a sec before saying, “Okay.” Then he picked up the gift certificate and set it beside the keyboard. He clicked a couple keys to wake up Mel’s computer.

“Oh… thanks,” said Lance. He slowly began to stand up. He seemed disappointed there was nothing left to argue. That was a big tell for Adam. Usually when he let students out of their contracts they left relieved. Lance, not so much…

“Why ‘can’t?’” asked Adam, turning away from the screen to look back at Lance.

“Wha - what?” stuttered Lance, freezing mid way between standing and sitting.

“You used the word can’t. You ‘can’t’ use the gift certificate. I’m curious why that was the word you initially chose.”

Lance looked stressed and his eyes flicked to the gift certificate for a free Bursleque course then back at Adam.

Adam waved his hand over the gift certificate and said, “This is settled already. I’m not looking for further justification. I’m honestly curious. Do you feel like talking to me about ‘can’t?’”

Lance lowered himself into the seat, tucking his hands between his legs and looking down at the edge of the desk. The boy that had been so vibrant onstage last night after his sisters had goaded him into free-styling a Burlesque routine along with a dozen other men pulled from the crowd. Yet today he looked so tiny and closed off. What happened to close him up?

“It’s stupid,” muttered Lance though Adam could see shiny eyes ready to release tears.

“Nothing that hurts your feelings is stupid. I once cried at a bagel shop because they cut my bagel thick on one side and thin on the other.”

Lance laughed. “That sounds stupid.”

“Yeah, but my cream cheese to bagel ratio was all off. Too much on one side, too little on the other and it was my cheat day.”

Lance chuckled again. “Okay, that does suck.”

“Lance,” said Adam softly, “you seemed really excited by your win last night so what happened between last night and this afternoon that turned into ‘can’t?’”

Adam watched those tears bubble up and slip over as Lance tried to rub them away with his sleeve. Adam moved the Kleenex box over to sit in front of Lance. He waited until Lance was ready to start talking and then Adam got the full story.

Lance had been the only one in his family to come watch his sisters perform in the showcase. None of the other family members had been offered an invite. That made sense to Adam. Students and teachers alike shied away from inviting parents and brothers. Usually only sisters were brought to shows on top of partners and friends. It was a positive that Veronica and Rachel felt like Lance would watch their performance without judgment. As much as Adam hates the stigma surrounding Burlesque and Pole, he fully recognizes that the costuming can make some people a bit uncomfortable. To put it frankly: it’s a lot of butts.

This morning Veronica and Rachel had mentioned Lance winning the Mr. Altea burlesque competition to their brothers and they’d requested to see the video Rachel had filmed on her phone. Rachel had innocently obliged, feeling proud of her brother. What none of them had expected was for Luis and Marco to laugh at the video as if it were a comedy routine. Lance had become embarrassed. Rachel, that spit fire, had gotten angry with her older brothers. Veronica, ever the diplomat, had tried to reasonably talk things out. That’s when Luis had ignored his sister and turned to Lance and said, “C’mon. You gotta admit you look like a fruit.”

Like a fruit…

Lance had lost the ability to speak for a minute while the tears flowed freely. When he seemed to be a bit calmer Adam had said, “Okay first off, fruit are like vegetables but not disgusting so I don’t accept that as an insult. Fruit is our word now and I’m taking it back.”

Lanced let out a choked laugh. “You don’t get it. I’m not brave like you. I can’t just live like you.”

“Like what?” asked Adam, getting a sense he knew what Lance was implying, but wanted him to say it.

“Like… out.”

“What part of you isn’t out, Lance?”

Adam had been the audience for a lot of people coming out. He had a joke with himself about collecting coming out stories. Sometimes he felt bad being present for this moment of vulnerability as friends or even strangers confessed this piece of themselves they’ve been holding secret, but only because Adam had never come out to anyone. 

No, he’d never needed to. Adam was gay at a glance. Had been since he was a toddler explaining to his parents that if he were in the Little Mermaid he’d do the same thing as Ursula and use his magic to steal away Eric and marry him.

He was three and he identified with the queer coded octopus woman based on a drag queen!

There was no question. But because there was no question, there was no hiding either. There was no safety of the closet to protect his delicate feelings (that story about crying over the bagel was true. Adam had the sensitivity of a pregnant woman,) which meant hardening up his skin in regards to his sexual orientation wasn’t a choice, but a must. It was that or let in all the judgments and spiral into self hatred…

So Adam knew why people chose to come out to him. He made being gay look easy even if hidden from view was how it nearly destroyed him in his youth… but that’s likely what they needed. They needed the hope that it could be simple and for the most part being himself was or at least a hell of a lot easier than pretending to be anyone else.

Lance spoke without further encouragement, telling Adam his story. Him and Rachel were Irish Twins, which meant they were born within a year of each other. Because of that she was his playmate when they were younger and he had an interest in the games she liked to play, dolls and dress up, putting on plays. It’s not like his family had come and ripped the doll out of his hands, but there were little things, looks and comments, being told to go play outside with his big brothers… Lance was okay with that. He liked sports too, but slowly he got the message: he wasn’t supposed to like things that were for girls.

But Lance liked dancing and gymnastics and singing and drama. He liked all the boys stuff too, but he felt so limited. Yet, as he grew up it was harder and harder to take that stand and stick with all his interests. It was easier to just go with the flow. 

Instead of being interested in “girl things” he took up an interest in girls. And it’s not like Lance was gay and overcompensating, he clarified. But… he did realize at age twelve he was bisexual.

“This probably sounds offensive…,” began Lance.

“It’s okay,” encouraged Adam.

“It’s just… I’ve thought a lot about how it would easier if I was just gay.” Just gay? Never mind. Lance had warned him it would sound offensive. “Or just straight or I could just be feminine or masculine and not feel like I’m always letting part of me down.”

Lance talked for the better part of the hour about the pressure he felt to be a certain way. Especially being a child of an immigrant family and the neighbourhood he grew up in. 

Lance told Adam he was the first he was sharing this with, but Adam could tell he’d thought about this so much. Held so much of it back for so long.

“I wonder,” said Adam, “If the attitude in your family is as bad as you’ve built it up in your mind. Your sisters are both community members and your family still –“

“It’s different for them,” said Lance, cutting Adam off. He could tell by Lance’s rapid speaking that he’d struck a nerve. “No one could ever tell Rachel what to do and Veronica’s always done what she wants. They’re stronger than me.” Lance’s voice broke. “And… they’re girls. It’s a different standard. I’m supposed to be a man.”

Adam tented his fingers and rested his chin there. He looked Lance in the eye and said calmly, “So if you act like a man and deny your feminine side, you’re weak? But if you’re strong and come out then you’re not a man?” Adam watched Lance for this small nod of confirmation. “So this situation to you is completely impossible and you lose no matter what?” Lance sniffed, more tears slipping out. “No wonder you’re all torn up. You’re completely boxed in.”

“I just…” Lance sniffed again. “I keep my head down and try not to rock the boat.”

Adam sat up and considered Lance for a moment. “Can I tell you my opinion?” He gestured to Lance. 

“Yeah,” said Lance. He seemed braced for rejection.

“You say you don’t want to rock the boat, but here’s the thing, Lance. You’re not in the boat with everyone else.” Adam pressed his fingertips to the wood of the desk, representing the boat. He could see Lance ready to be very upset that he wasn’t in the boat, but Adam continued with a soft tone and said, “You’re the water.” 

Adam flattened out his palm and Lance looked at it with great confusion. “And just now your surface is visible to everyone in that boat and you’re doing everything you can to keep that water perfectly still, but little do they know that you have all these depths to you. You’ve got a whole underwater world down there going down deeper than we can see. Probably some ugly ass fish way down there, but also sunken ships and other treasures.”

Lance sniffed. “How do you know that?

“Because I’m in a submarine. A really nice one that’s tastefully decorated and I see you through my porthole.” Adam held out his fingers in a circle and it made Lance giggle. “I see a young man who is smart and creative and artistic and a natural born performer with a flare for the dramatic that rivals Rachel’s.” Lance outright laughed. Adam dropped his hands. 

“And I want you to know I’m being honest when I say this place…” Adam gestured around the room, “It could be your sparkle. It could be the place you sink your passion into. The place where you find your community. The place where you get your validation from.” Adam watched Lance’s eyebrows turn up and his bottom lip quiver.

“But also...,” said Adam and he watched Lance brace himself for the letdown. “It doesn’t have to be this. Your sparkle could come from anything you set your mind on, anything you put your heart into. You like cooking? You could be a chef. You want to fly planes? Be a fighter pilot. You can literally do anything and get that same feeling. This place is an option. It’s a good option if I’m being honest. But we’re not going anywhere and you can come back years from now – here’s hoping we’re still here and I have a job – and pick this up. It’s not your only option. My real advice is this, whatever you do next, make waves.”

“Waves?” repeated Lance.

“Make waves,” said Adam, making his hand roll like a wave. “Get that below up to the surface. Rock that boat. Don’t wait any longer. You owe it to yourself to be you on the outside, not just the inside.”

The hot tears came as Lance looked down and nodded. Adam reached out and cupped his hands, feeling himself start to tear up too. “What do you wanna do?” asked Adam.

“I wanna take a Burlesque class,” said Lance, still upset but certainty finding its way into his quivering voice.

“That’s awesome,” said Adam then he let go of Lance’s hands and turned to the computer. A few clicks and scrolls and he was ready to do business. “I’ve got Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday nights. Which works for you?”

“Do… you teach any of those?” 

Adam looked over at Lance’s big shiny eyes. He thought for a second then held up a finger to let Lance know he needed a minute. He scooped up the office phone and dialed a number by memory. When the phone picked up he said, “Luca, it’s Adam. I wanna take your Sunday evening Burlesque class.”

“No way I’m getting shorted a class,” said Luca, “I’ve got rent to pay.”

“I’m obviously going to give you my eleven am hot yoga.”

“Make it your three pm suspension yoga and you’ve got a deal.”

Adam almost protested, but looked at Lance and remembered why he was doing this. Sure, it would mean he’d be at the studio for eleven hours on Sunday and he’d end up with two lunch breaks, but it was worth it. “Deal. Love you. Bye.”

He hung up and went about fixing up the schedule as need be. “Okay, you are in the nine pm Sunday Burlesque class taught by me.”

Adam reached into the desk drawer and took out a key tag. He typed the number into the computer then tossed it to Lance. “That’s your membership tag. I’ve linked you to your sisters’ family account so literally all I need from you is your date of birth”

“Uh, July 28, 1995.”

“Perfect,” said Adam, typing that in. “Phone please and unlock it.”

Lance handed over his unlocked phone and Adam when into the app store. “I am downloading our app and giving you a temp login. You’ll have to make up a password later.”

Adam switched back to the computer while that downloaded. “I am also giving you a complimentary ten class pass and sticking you in some drop in classes this week that I think you’ll enjoy including Zumba, which I am teaching in ten minutes. All these classes will be listed in the app and you are free to remove yourself or rearrange the classes you want to be in however you like. These are just suggestions.” 

Adam switched from the computer back to Lance’s phone and did the temp login for him. “And you are all set,” he said while handing Lance back his phone. “Welcome to the Kingdom of Altea Fitness. Where we slay on the dance floor. Think you’re up for Zumba?”

“Well,” began Lance, looking down at his jeans. 

Adam spun in the chair and reached into a cardboard box in the corner. He pulled out a pair of Altea Fitness leggings and tossed them over to Lance. “Another complimentary gift. Get changed in the washrooms and I’ll see you in the back studio in approximately nine minutes.” When Lance looked dazed ,Adam added a “Scoot!” and the boy started moving. Sometimes people need a kick in the pants just to get them to do what they already want to do.

“Uh thanks, Adam,” said Lance, pausing in the doorway. “For listening and…”

“Glad to have you here, Lance,” said Adam sincerely.

As soon as Lance was out of the office, Mel came back in dressed in her pole shorts and top. She immediately went to the computer, reaching across Adam’s lap so she could look at Lance’s new file.

“That’s a lot of free classes... and leggings?”

“It’s a lot of freebies up front, I know, but I think you’ll be collecting membership fees off that one for a long time.”

Melenor looked down at him and said, “You don’t actually think that’s why I wanted you to be the one to talk to him.”

“Naw,” said Adam, rubbing Mel’s back. “I know why.”

“You did well,” said Melenor, giving Adam’s shoulders a squeeze.

“Mel, you big softie,” teased Adam.

“We are not just a gym. We are in the business of improving lives and you just did that for him.”

“That’s why you pay me the big bucks.”

“Hardly,” scoffed Mel. “I’m taking the leggings out of your paycheque.”

Adam gasped. “Rude!”

“You have a class to teach. Get out of my chair.”

“Fine,” said Adam, standing up. “I’m going because I want to and not because you’re my boss and you told me to and I love this job and I never want to lose it.”

“Just close the door when you leave,” said Mel, dropping into her chair.

“Love you too,” shouted Adam before slamming the door because he knew it would make Mel growl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loving Burlesque, Lance takes pole dancing next. Within two years he's teaching both at Altea Fitness! At the future summer showcase Adam's boyfriend brings his grumpy younger brother to see the performance...


	4. Day Fifteen: Beach Day aka Boys in Bikinis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Mature  
> Wordcount: 1492  
> Summary: A day off on a beach planet goes awry when Lance sees Keith in a bikini  
> Additional Tags: Canonverse, season seven setting, Lance is too bi to function, beach hijinks
> 
> Song: Girls in Bikinis - Poppy
> 
> "I wanna see boys in bikinis too  
> They'd look good on you"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was also a Twitter thread! I left the emojis in...

Lance regrets being buried up to his neck in sand, but that’s only one of his many regrets. 

First, he regrets talking everyone into visit a beach planet on the journey home.

Second, he regrets the bikinis 👙 all the damn bikinis...

When he asked Coran to use the 3D printer they’d packed on Yellow to make everyone bathing suits, Coran asked for a reference. No problem. Lance had some beach photos stored on his phone. All featuring bikini clad babes that he regularly used as reference for 🤭 but there were dudes in trunks in the background too. He assumed Coran would make two styles of suits. He did not expect Coran to make bikinis 👙 for everyone! 

Colour coded to their Paladin colours and everything. When the guys collectively decided it was better than skinny dipping and put on the bottoms, Coran and the other Alteans seemed highly offended they weren’t wearing the tops and because the logic behind “amab nipple good, afab nipple bad” didn’t hold up with aliens it became less of a headache to just wear the damn tops too.

So now the beach day Lance has been dreaming of since he left Earth is finally happening but it’s spoiled by all of them in bikinis. 

No, he wanted to see Allura and Romelle in bikinis! Don’t get him wrong!

What he wasn’t prepared for was all the boy butts.

Talkin’s Hunk’s badonkadonk 🚚

Shiro’s buns of steel ⚓️

Coran’s...❓ (actually, every time Lance looked Coran’s way he blacked out. Something about space uncle butt just wouldn’t register with his brain.)

Then there’s Keith’s butt...

Keith’s juicy peach 🍑 

Oh boy...😰

Who gave him the right?! How is that legal?!

Lance used to think only girls had nice butts. That’s a reality he really wished hadn’t been shattered because now all these boy butts are just so round and out there and in Lance’s face.

(Consequence of the hole, having to look up!)

And here he thought the hole 🕳 was a great idea! A task to distract himself from BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS!

Digging the hole was fun. Climbing inside was fun. Getting everyone to bury him in the sand was fun. 

The issue - the regret - came when he asked them to shape him like a mermaid 🧜🏽♀️

Allura and Romelle didn’t have any concept of what a mermaid is so they were immediately took off to frolic in the water WITHOUT LANCE!! It ended up just being Hunk and Keith who were interested in giving Lance a tail and boobs made out of sand.

Speaking of boobs, Hunk and Keith fill out their bikini tops nicely. Pre-space whale Keith had been a skinny boy, but he came back from his side quest grizzled (a.k.a he got them pecs now,) which makes Lance feel a little more than self-conscious because it seems everyone is filling out their bikinis nicely except for Lance. Wait... is this how girls feel??

But that means Lance isn't just distracted by boy butts, but also by boy boobs.

Boy boobs! Can you believe it?

Yet, even though Keith possesses them, he doesn't seem like he understands them...

"Those are uneven," says Lance, looking at the misshapen lumps he’s formed to be Lance's mermaid boobs. "Have you ever seen boobs before?"

"I try to avoid them," says Keith with a smirk.

"Girls don't like it when you avoid them, Keith. No bueno."

"Girls not liking me isn't an issue."

Wait? WHAT?!

Then Hunk interrupts to help reshape the breasts because Lance needs to look like God's gift to fish for the photos. And then after that.... everyone just leaves him there.

Alone? In a hole? With his thoughts?

((with his horny thoughts??))

Oh no...

And they are indeed horny because everywhere there are boobs and butts and very few of them belong to Allura and Romelle who are off swimming and not caring at all that Lance is in a hole. 

((A horny hole of shame))

But for some reason Keith ((juicy peach Keith!!!) keeps finding excuses to step over him. And not facing him either. No. We're talking booty to face. Just over and over for different reasons.

Keith always needs to be on the other side of the Lance-cream-filled-hole (well... not cream... not yet anyway.) 

((That's actually the worrisome part because...)) while Keith is playing frisbee with Pidge and skipping back over Mermaid Lance and then jogging back over him (booty bouncing as if Bay Watch shot all the slow motion running scenes from behind) Lance's brain can't separate boy butt from butt-butt

So it just sees butt!! And then he sorta maybe gets too excited. Like... not to be gross or lewd or overly descriptive BUT (hehe butt) if Lance were to parish in this hole and fossilize, future Archeologists would find not one, but two holes. One for Lance and one tiny one... right above his crotch area.. And not that is not an exaggeration for although most clothing would restrict something like that from *ahem* breaking free, these biniki bottoms are reall,y really tiny you guys!!

So Lance is miserable and he regrets three things but not in that order.

Now he’s stewing in a hole made of sin 🕳 but he needs to calm down because he can’t get out of the timeout thirst hole until he’s caaaaaalm. 

It sucks because he’s missing beach games and swimming and daring Keith to do a hundred pushups while he rides his back and fuuuuuck...

He didn’t mean to think that last one!

“Hey buddy!” says Hunk. “You must be ready to get out of there by now, right?” 

Before Lance cantop him, Hunk digs down into the sand to grab Lance’s arms and pull him out of his hole 🕳 despite his protests of “No no no!”

It just happens so fast and Lance can only count on the up-spray of sand to conceal anything he desperately doesn't want to be seen. (Why can he feel Keith watching him? And why can’t he escape the feeling that Keith *knows* this boner is about his peach 🍑 )

((🎵You’re so vain you   
Probably know this boners about you! Don’t you? Don’t you, Keith?🎵))

The sand cloud is everywhere. All over Hunk (and for a moment Lance worries he just ejaculated sand over him! But there is no endorphin rush to accompany it so he’s sure he didn’t... pretty sure.)

He has to act quickly before the dust/sand settles. As soon as Hunk releases Lance’s hands, he slaps them over his sand worm and sprints straight into the cold water (Note: this is the only thing Lance has done “straight” today.)

Cold water heals all. It calms Lance. At least to the point where he can tuck again. It isn’t until he’s fully secure in his “calmness” that Lance returns to swallower waters. 

He’s okay, he thinks as he pushes through knee deep water towards the shore. He can handle this now. He just needs to stay at eye level and not booty-level.

There’s a whistle... Lance looks down to see Keith floating by on his back just behind Lance. 

“Wha-?” begins Lance. 

“You fill out that suit nice,” says Keith, grinning so much his pointy canines show. 

Lance blushes so deep he feels his butt cheeks go red. “What? This pancake ass?” 🥞 protests Lance.

“Pancake?” Repeats Keith going to stand up in the water. When he does it’s not exactly like the little mermaid bursting from the water and flipping her hair, but it leaves the same impression with Lance. “More like a whole stack of pancakes with all the toppings.” 🥞🥞🥞

“Toppings?” Inquires Lance, He’s more than halfway to feeling honoured. “Like butter and syrup?”

“Fruit, strawberries...” 🍓 lists Keith. “...whipped cream...”

“Oh no, no whipped cream,” says Lance. “Not yet anyway... so unless you’re offering...?” Holy gay flirt Batman! What is Lance doing?

“Offering whipped cream?” asks Keith and he looks confused... okay, Lance lost him. 

“Your whipped cream on my stack of pancakes ass,” presses Lance because he’s more concerned with getting Keith to understand than stopping himself when he’s getting in over his head. 

“Oh...” then Keith’s eyes grow wider 👀 “Ahhhhhhh... that’s doable.” 

Lance gulps. “Really?”

“I know a place” hums Keith, sinking back into the water so he can float on his back then he backstrokes away. It takes Lance a moment to decide he is DEFINITELY following him and dive underwater (also, he has a repeat offender in ((poking out of)) his bikini bottoms) 👙 so he needs to hide that under water. 

Meanwhile back at the beach, it takes the others half an hour to realize Keith and Lance have disappeared.

“Perhaps they’re in that cove over there,” says Allura, pointing. “Shall we go check?”

“Uhhh,” says Shiro, putting a hand over her finger and gently lowering down her arm. “Let’s give them some space.”


	5. Day Sixten: Modern AU aka Essential

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Teen  
> Wordcount: 1507  
> Summary: An essential worker meets a boy with blue eyes at the checkout counter.  
> Additional Tags: Modern AU, Grocery store clerk Keith, set during the pandemic, angst with fluff, bittersweet
> 
> Song: Modern Love - Mother Mother
> 
> "And it's true, yeah, it's true I fell for you.  
> Yeah it's true, true I fell into you.  
> This is love in the modern day, the modern way  
> This is love in a different time, a different place oh yeah  
> Yeah, yeah, oooh, yeah."
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a twitter thread I wrote a few months ago that I thought deserved a spot on ao3. This is the very definition of "modern au"

Essential? 

The government has deemed Keith essential. Crazy considering how many time he's been shamed for "just" bagging groceries. But everything changed so quickly. Now Keith's wearing a paper mask and gloves to "just" bag groceries (that and run the till.) 

The mood is pretty somber yet he's exhausted. He hasn't stopped moving since he clocked in seven hours ago. The quiet is broken as he sends one customer off and begins scanning the next.

The guy's young, his own age. He's still unloading his cart onto the belt. He's not the one that breaks the silence. The woman behind him does. She's having a fit because this guy's taken more than one of some of the items that are labeled "take only one." It's Keith's job to enforce that rule even though every time he tries it gets ugly and the manager has to get involved.

"I have nine other people at home," the boy says, guilt in his voice.

"Then tell them to get their own food," the woman argues.

"It's okay," says Keith, speaking up. "I know him. He's telling the truth." He doesn't know this guy, but the relief that flashes in his eyes is worth the lie. His eyes are blue. It's all he can tell about his face since a homemade cloth mask covers the rest. The eyes are pretty. It's enough to make Keith's heart squeeze just a bit because it means he can still feel these things. 

He can feel something other than worry and exhaustion.

The boy has gloves on. He helps Keith pack up the cart's worth of food. Keith gives him the total for the order, but he's unsure if the boy is even listening because he seems too stressed about getting it all back in the cart. He hands over an envelope of cash without commentary. There are large and small bills mixed in and even some change.

Keith sets about counting it while the woman who is next in line rolls her eyes.

He's... he's short $9.10

Something has to go back. Keith looks at the boy rearranging bags in the cart. He doesn't have the heart to speak up. These days things choke up in Keith's throat before he even has a chance to say them.

"Excuse me, but there's a line," says the woman.

On impulse Keith lets some of the change slip through his fingers. "Oops" He bends to the ground as the woman clicks her tongue. Out of sight, he pulls out his own wallet and slips a $10 bill out. He stands and puts the money in the register.

"Here's your change sir," says Keith, offering 90 cents.

"Uh change?" he seems baffled. "You can keep it." 

"I'm not allowed. Here."

The boy with the blue eyes takes it and from the crinkle there Keith can tell he's smiling.

"Take care," says Keith.

The boy gives him finger guns. Keith turns back to the woman who looks like she wants to vault the register and check herself out. He manages to resist the urge to call her ‘Karen.’

The last hour of Keith's shift passes equally boring and stressful. Life has a taste about it these days both stale and bitter. He walks home in the dark. The streets are almost empty. He's never been one to talk to strangers before, but now he says hi to people he passes. 

It's needed for some reason. This bit of contact.

The apartment's empty. His brother's a paramedic and he's essential too. Keith worries about him when he's on shift since he's working the front lines of this... this thing they're living.

Keith strips his mask and gloves and trashes them. Takes off all his clothes and puts them in the hamper. All the way in. Not half hanging out like before... this.

He showers and puts on sweats. He finally feels clean enough to go into his bag and take out his phone. He doesn't want to touch it during shift. 

He worries...

Messages from Shiro checking in. Also messages from friends. He goes on Facebook, resolving to not click on every news article he sees. He'll scroll for cat pictures. He'll keep himself sane enough to sleep. 

His scroll (of reading scary headlines) is interrupted by 'Suggested Friends.' Normally he'd ignore it, but a set of blue eyes makes him stop.

It's almost surreal to recognize him this easily just from a profile photo when he never saw his whole face. (This is also confirmation that our phones track our every movement and know when we've met someone, but Big Brother doesn't bother Keith like it used to.)

_ Lance McClain _

Huh. He doesn't look like someone with a last name like McClain. Could he be adopted like Keith?

He clicks because his click finger is itchy from resisting all those baity headlines. Lance McClain keeps his profile public which means Keith sees everything.

A bit of light stalking through his photos and he confirms he really does live with nine other 

family members. His whole family is tagged in photos and he can see their names too. His dad's last name is Santos. His mother's McClain. So he's biracial and has his mother's last name. Interesting.

He's also devilishly handsome. The kind of guy Keith would need to have taken five shots at the bar before he would dare to approach him (normally three shots do for less gorgeous guys.) Most of his current posts are social justice minded mixed with memes and messages of hope and positivity.

Keith checks the clock. He's been stalking this guy for half an hour. Is this what his social life is? Quietly creeping a guy's facebook and daydreaming about what things could've been if he'd met him before... this?

He exits out of the facebook. Makes food. Watches The Office until he's drifting off on the couch. He wakes up when his phone buzzes. He thinks it's Shiro and assumes the worst.

It's not.

It's a Messenger request from one Lance McClain 

Keith swipes it open. Clicks through until he can read it.

_ Lance: This might be crazy, but you were one of my Suggested Friends and I recognized your eyes from the checkout. _

Keith has never clicked 'accept' so fast in his life. 

_ Keith: Family of ten, right? _

At least he can play aloof.

_ Lance: I guess that makes an impression. Look, I did the math. _ _   
_ _ Keith: The math? _ _   
_ _ Lance: The total on my receipt. It was higher than the cash I had. _ _   
_ _ Keith: was it? _ _   
_ _ Lance: fine. don't own up to your good deed.  _ _   
_ _ Lance: just be my secret guardian angel _ _   
_ _ Keith: it wasn't a big deal _ _   
_ _ Lance: maybe it wasn't. but I cried about it. _ _   
_ _ Keith: geez _ _   
_ _ Lance: don't feel flattered. I cry easily these days. _ _   
_ _ Keith: I feel that _ _   
_ _ Lance: I just wanna say thank you _ _   
_ _ Keith: you're welcome. _

Now Keith wants to cry.

_ Lance: I'm so glad Facebook suggested you as a friend. Normally because I would flirt with you relentlessly. _

Keith's happiness sparks up stronger than it's felt in weeks. He wants to flirt with him?

Wait... normally? Oh no...

_ Lance: But this time I have a different motive.  _

Keith isn't sure what to expect so he braces himself.

_ Keith: oh? _ _   
_ _ Lance: I'm actually wanting to ask if your store is hiring. I got laid off from my job. So did almost everyone in my household and I really need some income to support my family. Half my siblings have asthma and I'm really trying to get them to stay home through this so if I can bring in some money, it'll help us so, so much. _ _   
_ _ Lance: Sorry to ask when you've already helped me out today. _ _   
_ _ Keith: Yeah sure. We're hiring like crazy. Send me your resume and I'll email it to the manager. _ _   
_ __ Lance: literally my personal saint and saviour 😇😇😇

Lance sends the file and Keith sends it off to his manager. 

The next day Lance is hired and they become co-workers... at a reasonable distance. 

Things keep going to shit. Keith quits reading stuff on Facebook. Only chats with Lance there. At work they're usually just giving each other waves from across the store. Things suck, but... Keith's chest isn't as tight anymore.

Shiro comes home safe every night. He's grateful for little things. Sometimes the quiet feels like a scream. Other times it's...peaceful.

Keith is on his lunch break when Lance sits down (six feet from him.)

"You know," says Lance, starting up like they were already talking, "when this is all over I'm going to take you on a date."

"I don't know if this is ever going to be over," says Keith, letting that hang in the air. They both stare off into the parking lot. He turns to look at Lance, meeting his eyes over his face mask. "So we should probably just say we're dating now." 

Keith can tell Lance smiles even if he can't see his mouth. He sees it in his eyes. 


	6. Day Seventeen: Keith & Lance aka Welcome Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Teen  
> Wordcount: 300  
> Summary: My piece for the Klance Home Party Zine (which I probably could've posted a long time ago.) Keith gets home first from mission, gets drunk, calls Lance. Based in Save a Lion, Ride a Cowboy-verse  
> Additional Tags: post-canon, fluff, married Klance
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE I REARRANGED THE CHAPTERS so Chapters 4&5 are brand new and this one is older!

“Stop laughing at me!”

“Babe, I’m not laughing.” Lance was working very hard to not let a laugh escape even though crying Keith was literally the cutest thing he’d ever seen. “I just didn’t expect you to go out and get drunk with my siblings.”

“What am I supposed to do when you’re not here?” 

Lance moved his comm closer to his face to see the video chat clearer just as Keith lifted up the hem of his shirt and used it to blow his nose. “Did you just blow your nose on my shirt?” asked Lance.

“It’s mine now. I needed a Lance substitute since you’re still on your dumb Blade mission.” Unfortunately, they didn’t always get partnered together. With his seniority, Keith normally got the harder, longer solo missions and Lance was usually the first back to the farm, but this time… “It smells like you,” cried Keith, pressing his entire face into the hem of the shirt. Lance winced because that was where the snot was… “I miss you so much! Why can’t you just be here?”

“Okay. I’ll be right there.” Keith gave a sarcastic laugh and rolled his eyes. Meanwhile, Lance opened the door to the bar and snuck inside. His siblings nearly gave away his surprise, spotting him first and cheering. He shushed them.

“Don’t shush me,” snapped Keith. 

Lance spotted that familiar mullet sitting at the bar. He snuck up behind him and placed his face right on Keith’s shoulder so he was visible on Keith’s comm screen. Confused, Keith did a double take, then when he finally realized it was Lance in person, he turned around and wrapped him up in the biggest hug. “You’re such an asshole,” Keith sobbed.

Lance held his husband tightly. “I’ll take that as a ‘welcome home.’”


	7. Day Twenty: Canon-Divergence aka Space Whale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 1736  
> Summary: Lance is trapped on a Space Whale with Keith. Worse he's freezing at night, luckily, Keith offers his body for warmth.  
> Additional Tags: Canon-divergent, survival sex, dry humping, anal sex, Top Lance, Bottom Keith
> 
> Song: The Heat - The Score
> 
> "I'm a desert, you're an ocean  
> It's your motion that I need  
> But without you I am broken  
> Left to thirst out in the heat"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally a twitter thread. Hey! Follow me on Twitter @bangbangbeefke1

Lance can only hope he won’t be trapped on this Space Whale with Keith for long. The days are bearable, but the nights are so cold. 

Whatever heating element his armour had was damaged in the accident that stranded them here. His undersuit is thermal and during the day he can run around and build up enough heat to get him by, but at night the temperature drops so low it eats away at the residual heat until Lance is left shivering on the ground.

Keith’s Blade Suit seems to be functioning fine. At least Lance assumes. He hasn’t told Keith about how cold he gets at night so they haven’t discussed it, but he hasn’t noticed Keith shivering. He would too since Keith has taken to sleeping beside him. Lance suspects he’s trying to pass body heat but nothing is passing from that thick, rubbery blade suit. 

The cold isn’t the only thing keeping Lance up at night. There’s also the time flashes...

During the day the flashes are scenes from their lives, but at night... at night they take on a different tone entirely...

Flashes of bare flesh, hands gripping, hot puffs of air. It’s like when a normal TV station turns into softcore porn after midnight.

If Lance were back on the Castleship, free porn streamed into his brain wouldn’t be a bad thing. On the Space Whale with Keith, it sucks. And ya know, Lance can recognize his own damn cock when he sees it! Not cool, Time Flashes! No peeking!

The third night is unbearable. The porn flashes are appearing at intervals seemingly designed to startle Lance right when he's drifting off and the cold is bone-deep.

"Lance?"

He'd thought Keith was asleep...

"I'm fine. Go to sleep." He's too defensive. Fine people don't state they're fine without being asked first.

Keith rolls over to face him, apparently unconvinced of Lance's fine-ness. "You can't keep having nights like this."

Lance stews in shame. He doesn't like looking weak in front of Keith. "My nights are fine. I'm just a little restless. Who wouldn't be stranded on a Space Whale?"

Keith removes one glove and touches the back of his fingers to Lance's cheek. They're warm. They're so warm...  
"You're freezing," says Keith. He sits up and reaches behind his neck. Lance doesn't understand the gesture until he sees Keith's suit loosening. He's unzipping it.

"Wait wait wait!" protests Lance.

"I can help you," insists Keith.

"You don't need to give me your Blade suit!"

Keith freezes, suit pulled down just past his collarbone. "That's not... that's not what I'm doing."

Before Lance can ask what it is he is doing, Keith pulls the arms out of his suit and tugs it down past his chest... so low Lance can see his hip bones.

Lance blushes at the sight. "You aren't trying to do the hypothermia thing are you? I'm not spooning you naked!"

Keith shakes his head gently. "We'd both get cold. No... I need to get your core warmed up so the thermal of your undersuit can trap the heat."

Lance has bristles, props himself up on his forearms. "So like... go for a run?"

"Lance...," replies Keith, his voice so soft, drawing out Lance's name. He closes any illusion of space between them, crawling to place a hand on either side of Lance's hips. "...lemme help."

Lance gulps. He's just starting to get an inkling of what 'help' means when a particularly aggressive Time Flash hits them:

Cock. Flesh. Pound.

"'k-kay..." says Lance weakly when the bright light retreats but the spark of warmth forming in his core doesn't.

Keith explores him with a hand first. He palms as Lance's hardening bulge. There's warmth growing there. Even if Lance can't feel his own fingers. Even if he keeps trembling (but that could be nerves.) There’s something warming below.

Next Keith ducks down and nuzzles at Lance's bulge with his nose, mouths at it through the undersuit. Lance can't feel any heat from Keith's mouth, but he's finding his core is firing up, furnaces stoked.

Lance lies back, relaxes into it, exhaustion hitting him. He hasn't slept in days, been wearing his energy out just shivering. It weighs on him like gravity.

It's dark too. The time flashes always chase away his night vision. He can see Keith is fussing more with his own Blade Suit. The utility belt Keith always wears, drops down beside him. For a moment Keith's touch leaves while he fusses with it on the ground.

It makes Lance feel so lonely, the loss of Keith's touch. Tears prick at his eyes. He doesn't understand it. 

then Keith is back on him. Really on him. Climbs on top of Lance, sits right on his hardness.

"Okay?" he asks, checking in.

"Yeah... getting warmer," says Lance.

"Tell me when you're red hot," says Keith and Lance can hear his smirk in his voice.

Keith proceeds to grind on top of him, slow and steady, weight just enough to create a beautiful bit of friction. Lance exhales the first warm puff of breath he’s created in hours.

Keith pushes his one still gloved hand to Lance's chest, uses it as purchase to increase his pace. The other hand Lance can't see, disappears behind Keith, but he likes this pressure on him. The force of Keith holding him in place.

Keith lets out a moan. It surprises Lance. He's sure this angle won't do anything for him, but the he keeps making noises as he grinds. 

Lance closes his eyes, relaxes into it. It feels good but he's tired and cold still. He appreciates what Keith is trying to do but he's doubting he'll warm up fully or even cum from this. 

"Okay, I'm ready," says Keith out of nowhere, climbing off Lance.

Wait... it's over?

Lance is cold... ice cold...

"Here," says Keith, spinning on all fours and facing himself away from Lance.

Dazed, Lance manages to sit up and notices for the first time Keith has pulled his blade suit most of the way down his ass. The sight of it…

Lance is... getting warmer...

"Wh-what are you...?" stutters Lance.

"I'm ready," says Keith, wiggling his ass just a little. "Here..." He reaches back towards Lance, a tube of lube in his hand.

"Where did you even-?"

"I keep it in my belt for emergencies," says Keith.

"In your belt?! What are you? Some kind of sex Batman?!"

"Lance," says Keith, his tone scolding. "You need to warm up. It's okay. I want it." Then he leans down on his forearms and just... waits.

Lance is definitely warm.

At least down low, but the rest of him, his extremities are cold. And he's tired. And he’s loopy. And porn keeps broadcasting into his brain.

That's why he says 'fuck it.' Why he gets up on his knees and shuffles over to Keith while pulling out his hard dick.

He uses the lube, spreading it hastily over his cock. Keith's knees are pressed together, Lance goes wide, spreading open to straddle his legs across Keith's.

Everything is so still and quiet as he lines himself up with Keith's prepped hole. Even the Time Flashes have paused. Are they watching?

Pervy flashes, this is what they want. Want Lance testing this, pressing the head of his cock into Keith's hole. Feeling that bit of resistance.

It's warm. 

He feels the heat on the tip.

Lance presses with just a bit more pressure, works past the resistance. Sinks in... All the way

It's warm. It's so warm inside of Keith. So tight and warm and safe.

Ice cold hands press to Keith's warm ass. The warmth spreads. Numbed nerve endings wake back up.

‘I want more,’ he thinks this as he pulls back to thrust back in, ‘more of this. All of this..’

He thrusts greedily into Keith, chasing after all the heat Keith promises. The only sound is Lance's balls slapping against Keith's ass.

He grunts. Hungry, yearning.

Keith was right. Keith was so fucking right. Lance needed this. He can feel warm spreading through him. 

Lance’s brain wakes up suddenly. It sets off an alarm 'WE'RE FUCKING KEITH' but he silences it again.

Keith is warm. Lance needs to be warm too.

More than that, he feels good. So fucking good. 

Keith lets out a moan. It drives Lance to speed up. Not only is it good for Lance, but he's getting Keith there. The idea of making Keith cum is hot. 

Red hot. 

Lance is getting red hot and suddenly Keith is clenching around his dick, moaning and pulling forward on Lance. But Lance holds him there. Wants to feel him while that orgasm writhes through Keith's body.

"Keith," mumbles Lance as he grips around his waist. He pulls him up to kneel up so his back is pressed to his chest and when Keith turns his head he can kiss him.

Keith's lips are warm, they warm Lance's too.

This angle is amazing. Lance is fed hot and on his way to white hot as he moans into Keith's mouth. His body is so warm against him. So warm. He's going to c -

"W-wait," sputters Keith. "Not in me."

Lance understands even if his instincts disagree. Keith drops back to his hands and knees and Lance pulls out. He jerks off until his cum is shooting across Keith's back, decorating him with thin white lines.

Lance squeezes out the last bit into his hand then presses his dick back inside Keith's warm, tight asshole.

"Sorry," sighs Lance, thrusting lazily, "for the mess."

"Easier to clean than my ass."

Keith feels so good. It's hard to leave the heat of his body. Even as Lance's dick softens. Eventually he pulls out and helps Keith wipe up his back before he pulls up his Blade suit. 

They lay back down, Keith's leaving the back unzipped so there's a bit of skin for Lance to press against.

"Warm now?" asks Keith, his voice all fucked out.

"Very. Thank you," says Lance, giving his waist a squeeze.

"We can do that anytime you're cold," promises Keith.

"Thanks," says Lance, a weird mix of embarrassed and grateful. "Can't be stuck here much longer, right?"

The End.

Bonus: AND THEN THEY FUCKED EVERY NIGHT FOR TWO YEARS AND THE TIME FLASHES MADE SENSE BECAUSE IT WAS ALL THEIR FUTURE FUCKING BEING PREDICTED!


	8. Day Twenty-Seven: AU of Choice aka Office AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For: keefkogayyy aka @guavaaajellybb on Twitter  
> "CEO Lance and Secretary Keef"  
> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 1832  
> Summary: Keith's boss is frustrated at work so he offers to relieve some tension...  
> Additional Tags: Office AU, Bottom Keith, Top Lance, mild sub/dom, dry humping, anal sex, cum licking, semi-public sex, sex while on a work call?, BKKE
> 
> Song: Work from Home - Fifth Harmony
> 
> "I ain't worried 'bout nothin'  
> I ain't wearin' na nada  
> I'm sittin' pretty, impatient, but I know you gotta"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not to be confused with my "The Office" AU. This is my story for the Bottom Keith Klance Exchange 2020 (which I am late posting for.)

Squirt squirt

The scents of Sandalwood, Vanilla and Tangerine hit the air as Keith watches him rub the lotion into his hands. It’s his nervous tick, moisturizing.

“Those are the numbers I got…”

“They’re not adding up,” answers the voice on speaker phone.

“Do you have the same numbers as me?”

Keith is supposed to be taking notes, he is the secretary afterall, but he’s only a temp. He’s bad at this job. He’s only been here a few weeks but he’s failing at most aspects of it. It’s not his fault, he gets distracted easily. Like now. He’s staring at the big bottle of lotion sitting on Mr. McClain’s desk.

Keith bought the same bottle. It cost him his full first paycheck, but he bought the same one. Only because he wanted that smell. Wanted it all over his body while he rode his dildo on the floor of his bathroom. Running the fan so his three roommates wouldn’t know what he was doing.

He needs the suction of the tile you see…

“Keith, are you getting any of this?” Mr. McClain cuts into his thoughts.

Keith tips the notebook towards him so it’s less obvious he’s written nothing. He scribbles mindlessly with his pen. If McClain asks later he’ll lie and say it’s shorthand.

He also angles the notebook to cover the tenting in his pants. He can’t help his reaction. That smell is sex.

It’s maybe a problem, associating it that way. McClain moisturises two.... three… up to ten times a day if he’s stressed (and he is very stressed today.) But that’s CEO salary for you. He can drop a quarter of a G on lotion and use it like it’s chapstick.

Keith, he spaces it out the usage. Maybe a few nights a week he indulges himself and rubs it all over. But only on nights when he’s fantizing about fucking his boss.

Was this not brought up yet? That Keith wants to fuck his boss. Wants him to bend him over that desk and just -

“Keith!” 

He wasn’t focusing again.

“Uh yeah?” He shifts on his seat, worried his erection is visible even with the notebook. He’s sensitive, just the rubbing against his nerdboy slacks (that he bought second hand to look presentable at this stupid job he would’ve quit if his boss wasn’t so goddamn h-)

“Did you send over the Dallas report yesterday like I asked?” He’s got his long nimble finger pressed on the mute button of the phone.

“Umm…” Keith can’t remember a Dallas report. He’s really shit at this job.

Mr. McClain sighs. “I’m in hot water here because of you and I’m not trying to - ugh,” he cuts himself off with a groan. “I’m trying to save my job here! I have no guarantees on whether I can save yours!” Right after he shouts it, he deflates, elbows dropping to his desk, face buried in his hands.

The mute button has been released and the guy on the other end is now shouting. The difference is Mr. McClain was angry but not cruel. This asshole on the line is cruel.

“I’m sorry,” says Keith and he’s standing, which is dumb because he’s still hard despite being yelled at (fuck, what does that mean?)

Lance’s hand drops to the mute button. “No, it’s not… I need to delegate better.”

That’s not true at all. He should’ve fired Keith that first week when he left his coffee sitting down in the lobby for an hour to get cold and then later tried to use the copier to send a fax.

“You’re a good boss,” says Keith, tiptoeing forward.

Lance chuckles and shakes his head. He’s still not looking up, just staring down at the phone that has the yelling man on it. Keith slips behind him, behind his desk chair. He leans in and whispers, “Tell him you have your team working on it.” 

It’s kinda meaningless buzzwords, but Lance repeats it. 

“You better! I’ve got a meeting with the rest of the board in less than an hour.”

The close proximity… this… smell. He places his hands on McClain’s shoulders and begins to massage the tense muscle through the silk shirt. “Tell him you’ll have it for him in forty-five minutes,” Keith whispers. 

“I’ll have it for you in forty-five minutes, Mr. Iverson.”

“That’s a start,” says Iverson. “Now we have a few more points to go over before I address the board of directors…”

“Hang up,” Keith huffs in his ear. He doesn’t know what he’s doing right now… but he’s fired anyway, right?

“I can’t,” he replies quietly. “I have to be on this call.”

“Fine,” mutters Keith and reaches over his shoulder and takes the phone off the cradle and lays it on the desk. He can still hear the voice on the other line, but faintly.

“Why are you -?” begins his boss, but he drops the question at the same time Keith swings and around and drops onto his lap. McClain’s blue eyes go wide in surprise.

Keith takes his boss’s hands by the wrists and pulls them close to his face. He inhales deeply, taking in that scent that’s been driving him crazy for weeks. He can feel his eyes rolling back inside his head. He wants these hands and that smell all over him so he moves those hands and places them on his ass.

McClain looks like he wants to say something, but glances at the phone. The Chairman of the Board can still kind of hear what’s happening on this end. In the silence Keith rolls his hips, feeling amazing satisfaction as he feels his boss hardening, his hands massaging his ass.

“Forty-five minutes,” McClain suddenly whines, a pinch of worry between his brows.

“You’ll do your best work after we release all this tension,” hums Keitih, really grinding down in his lap.

Then it all just… happens so fast.

McClain lifts Keith back up and spins him around and bends him forward so he has to plant his hands on the desk for balance. He reaches around and with a noisy clatter, opens his belt and fly and pulls Keith’s pants and underwear down past his hips. Keith is so ready for this, his cock is dripping precum onto the oak desk.

While McClain rattles with his own belt, Keith reaches over for the lotion, the only thing in sight that can be used as lube.

“Don’t,” says McClain, batting his hand away. Keith is somewhat insulted. Like his rich fucker’s hand cream is too good for his asshole. 

“Don’t what?” asks Iverson, his voice rising up enough to be audible.

“Dont… let me stop you,” says McClain with a wince as he pulls open his top left drawer. You’re on a roll with your ideas.”

Keith peers inside and sees what looks like a very pricey bottle of lube. Fuck, he could not be more into his boss. 

The prep is a quick fingering, all business, no indulgence. Normally it would be too little if Keith hadn’t stretched himself right out this morning, bouncing against his favourite dildo in the shower (thinking about his bosses slim hips) and making himself twenty minutes late for work… again.

Why does Mr. McClain even keep him around?

His question is answered with his boss’s fat cock pushing into him. 

Oh right… he must’ve wanted to fuck him. Good thing the feeling is mutual.

Mr. McClain fucks Keith hard and raw against his desk. All those weeks of sexual tension, released with him rocking Keith’s body fast and deep. 

“Oh fuck… Mr. McClain.”

“Don’t call me that,” whispers his boss. What else would he call him? Lance? Like it says on his gold foil lined business cards? “Call me sir.”

With that ‘Sir’ puts a hand on Keith’s shoulders and a second later he’s being forced face down onto the wood of the desk. He’s held like that as McClain snaps back his hips and rails him again and again, bottoming out each time.

Keith is looking right at that damn phone receiver so he knows he can’t say anything. He’s bites down hard on his bottom lip to keep from moaning. He’s not used to being taken this good, this rough.

“You like that?” mutters his boss, quiet enough to not be picked up by the phone.

“Yes sir,” groans Keith, the words escaping without permission.

“What was that?” barks Mr. Iverson, dropping off from his previous droning on.

“Just my secretary,” says McClain, hitting speaker phone as he steadies his hips. “I’m just… directing him through some difficult work… you know, multi-tasking.”

“Mmm,” ponders Iverson.

Meanwhile Keith is getting needy and starts rolling his hips to get that dick to hit just right.

“Sanda says your new boy isn’t very good.”

“Oh, he’s good,” hums McClain. “He’s very good… with some direction.”

“Be sure to ride him hard. No slacking.”

“I… will…,” says McClain, risking a couple snaps of his hips, forcing Keith to bite back his moans again.

“Listen, I have to jump on another call,” says Iverson, “Mind if I put you on hold?”

“Go ahead.”

As soon as the sound cuts out, McClain lets loose, drawing back his hips and fucking into Keith hard and fast.

“Oh sir, oh fuck, sir, fuck,” moans Keith, he’s drooling over what he’s now pretty sure is the Dallas report he failed to send yesterday.

McClain pulls back and slips out. Keith whines, missing his fullness, but McClain lines himself back up again.

“If you weren’t so damn tight, I wouldn’t slip out like that.”

“Sorry, sir,” mutters Keith. “I’ll do better, sir.”

“I know you will,” says McClain, placing his hand on the back of Keith's head and applying pressure. He then proceeds to fuck Keith so good he loses grip on time and space for awhile and comes to cumming on the floor while McClain hips start to stutter and roll then stutter again. He drops his weight on top of him as he goes.

“Fill me up, sir,” begs Keith. Fuck that smell, he’s covered in his smell. It’s intoxicating.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking good,” moans McClain, hips coming to a final stutter as he fills Keith up with his expensive CEO cum.

Iverson clears his throat. They both freeze. When did he come back on the call.

“Sorry, I had you on mute there. What’s good?”

“These uh… reports,” lies Lance, bouncing up to stand, slipping out of Keith. “They uh…”

Keith hands back the report now soaked in his drool. 

“The Dallas report,” says McClain, reading off the pages. “Looks good, so fucking good. Um. I’ll have it for you right away.”

Then he drops down to his knees and licks at the cum dripping down between Keith’s legs while Iverson wraps up the call.

“Still stressed?” asks Keith when they’re free to talk.

“No, but I will again be after this meeting.”

“I think I can work late…”


	9. Day Twenty-Eight: Birthday aka Part One of Countdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 3569  
> Summary: Another year, another ridiculously lavish birthday trip where Lance seems set on showing off how rich, famous, and fabulous he is to this three closest friends. Another trip Keith's gay-ass might not survive.  
> Additional Tags: Post-canon, Blade Keith, Actor Lance, Pining Keith, Gay Disaster Keith, eventual smut
> 
> Song: Feel This Moment (feat. Christina Aguilera) -Pitbull
> 
> "I see the future but live for the moment, make sense don't it  
> Now make dollars, I mean billions, I'm a genius, I mean brilliant  
> The streets is what schooled 'em  
> And made 'em slicker than Slick Rick the Ruler  
> I've lost a lot, and learned a lot  
> But I'm still undefeated like Shooter"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started this story last summer and didn't get it done in time for Lance's birthday either. I'll post a couple chapters over the next few days and maybe I'll get going and continue it? Warning that I may not make it to the smut XD

Just over twelve Earth hours left.

Keith let the wrist sporting the countdown watch drop to his side. If this mission kept hitting dead ends it would take at least another two days before it was complete. He would miss the clock hitting zero and that was… perfect.

Duty called. That was his out. Can’t be helped.

“In,” said Acxa as she stepped back from the keypad and the metal door slid open.

“Keith, take point,” ordered Krolia.

Keith stepped to the front of the elite Blade of Marmora members. His blade activated in his hand as Kosmo trotted up to his side. If this turned out to be the Kletvacian Warlord’s lair after all that could be a bad thing. Might mean they’d wrap the mission early. Keith wondered if he should throw the fight…

“Keith,” said Kolivan, sternly, bringing him back to reality.

Cautiously Keith entered the chamber, one hand on Kosmo’s pelt in case the situation called for an immediate exit, his stance ready for a fight.

“All clear,” said Keith as he did a 360 scan of the smallish room. Perfect. Another dead end. When his eyes returned to the entrance he saw all five Blades with their weapons drawn and pointed at him. “What are you…?”

“This is for your own good,” said Krolia.

“What is?” asked Keith, but even as he asked this question he felt that buzz in the air just behind him before the light of the wormhole that was forming shone on the Blade members that were closing in on his position. “No!” yelled Keith, now furious. “I told you I didn’t want to go this year!”

“You cannot avoid this, Keith,” said Kolivan.

“Yeah, quit being a baby,” agreed Ezor.

“You don’t know what it’s like over there!” shouted Keith, pointing at the wormhole.

“Better than what you’ll get if you stay here,” growled Zethrid, swinging her comically large blade around in a show of skill.

“Acxa, please,” begged Keith, directing this at the only sensible member of the group. “You of all people…”

“I agree with the others,” said Acxa, her tone flat. “You are behaving like a small human child.”

“You wanna run, Keith, you gotta get through all of us,” said Krolia.

Keith smirked. He wouldn’t have to. He clutched at Kosmo’s fur, signaling the wolf to teleport him away and ZAP!

Kosmo was gone and Keith was still standing there.

Et tu, Kosmo?

“Time to face your fears like a Galra,” said Zethrid, grinning.

“Flight or flight, what’s it gonna be furless one?” asked Ezor.

“Definitely fight,” sneered Keith before launching himself at his fellow Blades.

Barely thirty seconds had ticked down on the countdown watch before Keith went flying through the wormhole and landed with a painful thud on the other side.

“Whoa, Keith! Buddy, are you okay?” Hunk bent down to offer Keith a hand up. Keith was busy blinking at the blinding light above. He’d been in a dark room and now he was outside somewhere very sunny.

He could hear Pidge laughing hysterically beside him. “You came through that thing like you were launching yourself onto a Slip’n’Slide. Tell me you were filming that, Lance.”

“Lance,” muttered Keith into the dirt as he rolled to his front so he could push himself up, ignoring the hand being offered by Hunk.

“You had to make a grand entrance, didn’t you?” came Lance’s voice last. “You had to upstage me on today of all days!”

“Today is not your day,” mumbled Keith, picking himself up and watching the three wormholes disappear. One for each invited guest.

“It is the eve of my day,” chuckled Lance, always in good humour. “And the eve is just as important, nay, more important than the actual day.”

“You can’t get two days,” argued Keith. His eyes fell on his wrist, the numbers had jumped forward twenty-one minutes, accounting for the time dilation caused by his change of location in the universe. 

“I can and I will,” countered Lance.

“Where are we this time?” asked Keith, looking around. He’d rather soak in his surroundings than take in Lance just yet. He wasn’t ready. He thought he could avoid this… Damn Krolia.

Keith was immediately confused by the giant sign on the building in front of him that read “It’s Earth!”

“Are we actually on Earth?” asked Hunk, just as confused as Keith, “Or did the Earth store expand to a bigger location… Much bigger.” In fact the buildings and grounds laid out before them looked like…

“It’s a resort based on the store,” said Lance in a voice that tried to convey how impressive it was (it wasn’t.) “Store spinoff’s are so in right now.”

“Wait,” said Pidge, “I left Earth to go to a resort that’s based off Earth? I can stay home for that experience.”

“Yeah, it’s Earth-like, but they get everything kinda wrong, just like the store did,” explained Lance, “and it’s kitschy and weird and –“

“The hottest place in the universe right now,” said Pidge, Hunk, and Keith together.

Lance gasped. “How did you three know? You’d never even heard of it before.”

“Because you say that about every place every year,” said Pidge.

“Because I take you to the hottest place every year!” shot back Lance, “Plus it’s got amazing facilities, and a penthouse suite, and a rooftop bar and it’s –“

“One-hundred percent paid for by your celebrit-tay,” said the three others in unison, even pronouncing the word ‘celebrity’ like Lance would.

“Huh… do I really say the exact same thing every year?”

“Yes,” they all answered as a collective groan.

“Hmmm I should work on some new material.”

An inch… Keith would take Lance in an inch at a time, starting with his toes. That way he wouldn’t get overwhelmed and make his dumb gay overwhelmed face he tended to get whenever Lance would pop out of a wormhole, wink at Keith and go, “Hey Mullet, did ya miss me?”

“Anyhoo welcome…,” began Lance.

Toes, ankle, knees… no further, Keith. Slow down.

“…To Lance’s Annual Birthday Extravaganza!” It was the sudden movement of Lance dramatically throwing out his arms that caught Keith’s eye and forced him to look up and take too much in two soon. Lance’s normally tanned complexion was now a caramel brown, sun kissed by dozens of stars across the galaxy. His freckles danced across his nose and cheeks like constellations. His blue Altean marks popped on his cheeks bones, glowing brightly from the quintessence he’d relinquished to open three simultaneous wormholes around the universe at once (he was still the only part or full Altean alchemist capable of doing this and with a handheld tech of Pidge’s invention no less.) And his eyes were as twinkling and bright as those freshly whitened teeth.

And that was only his face….

Every year Keith saw Lance his body looked fitter and less lanky. He still had legs for days, but those legs had been introduced to a little thing called a Personal Trainer. Lance was already sporting a hotel robe and this was really dangerous because whatever he was wearing on the waist down underneath, Keith couldn’t see it. It could be nothing… Especially since it was open near the chest and… yes, Lance was at the very least shirtless.

Keith’s face was very dumb and very gay.

“I look forward to this every year!” said Hunk, lunging towards Lance to scoop him into a bear hug.

“I get excited every time I see that countdown round into the final days,” agreed Pidge. “I’m so down to turn my brain off for a couple days.” Then their eyes flipped to Keith and they grinned. “Keith already turned his brain off.”

Oh, so gay dumb face was very obvious.

Lance had been released by Hunk and had stepped up to scoop Pidge up into a hug. Even then his eyes met Keith’s. He had to fight to make his face look straighter and more capable of speech.

Did it work?

“It’s okay, Mullet,” said Lance, standing back to his full height. “You don’t need to admit how much you missed me.” Lance winked at him. “It’s written all over you.”

“I don’t have a mullet anymore!” protested Keith. Oh, so that’s the genius thing he was going to say? Well played.

“Beg to differ,” said Lance, tapping his perfectly manicured index finger on his chin.

“What do you call this?” asked Keith, yanking his long braid over his shoulder.

“Grown out mullet,” said Lance, without missing a beat. “C’mon.” Lance was offering out his arms and stepping forward towards Keith. Oh no, if Keith hugged him he might be able to tell if Lance was even wearing anything underneath and he couldn’t act this un-gay without mental prep.

“I was in the middle of a mission you know!” snapped Keith, taking a step back. Oh yes, start a fight. That had always shut down the gay back on the Castleship.

“Pfft. No you weren’t,” said Lance with a roll of his eyes. “At least not a real one.”

Something dark was dawning on Keith… “Lance,” he said through gritted teeth, “Did you make up a fake mission and have all my most threatening Blades come with me so you could ambush me with a wormhole and have them throw me through it!”

“It was mostly Krolia’s idea. She told me you wanted to skip this year, but thought that was kinda a shitty friend move so we conspired together.”

“That is extreme!” shouted Keith. “Even for you!”

“Oh honey, don’t be mad. It’ll give you wrinkles,” pouted Lance then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a tissue. “Here. Your lip is bleeding.” Then Lance went ahead and dabbed at Keith’s lip like he wasn’t directly in Keith’s (very gay) personal space. Keith could smell Lance’s cologne, Sage and sea salt. He smelt so good.

This was a bad situation for Keith which is exactly why he tried to avoid coming!

“I got it,” said Keith, yanking the tissue from Lance and dabbing it against his lip himself with way too much force.

“Besides,” said Lance, running a hand through his short cropped chestnut brown hair, “You can’t be mad at me. It’s my birthday.”

“Tomorrow is your birthday,” clarified Keith.

“Midnight is my birthday,” said Lance, tapping his own countdown watch. “And if you hated it so much, you wouldn’t wear your watch.” Then Lance grabbed Keith’s wrist, spun around and gave him a firm yank. “C’mon! I didn’t even tell you the best part!” Knowing Lance, he would declare at least twenty things ‘the best part’ before the trip was through. “This timezone on this planet perfectly lines up Earth’s midnight with their midnight.”

“They have a midnight?” questioned Hunk as they all made their way towards the resort entrance.

“Well, they call it moon apex,” said Lance, “But it’s pretty much the same thing. Simultaneous midnight!”

“How many times do I have to tell you,” said Pidge, “There is no such thing as a simultaneous event.”

“Seriously, Pidge,” snapped Lance, “If you explain the theory of relativity one more time on my birthday…”

“But it’s the entire reason I invented these countdown watches! So we could best match our body locations to the particular time point on Earth despite the degree of distance.”

“I’m just excited we get to celebrate your birthday turnover at night,” said Hunk, cheerily. “That time we celebrated it mid-afternoon in the Delphoid System was kinda anti-climatic.”

“That was the first birthday meetup year. We were still working out the kinks,” argued Lance. “Just think how perfect my Fiftieth Birthday Extravaganza will be!”

“We’ll still be doing this then?” asked Keith, allowing Lance to pull him into the lobby by the wrist because hey – they were practically holding hands, right?

“Of course! What kind of question is that? Will my three best friends still be joining me for my birthday three decades from now? Obviously!”

“No one loves their birthday like Lance,” chuckled Pidge.

“Because I’m a Leo!” said Lance, defensively as they stepped onto the elevator. “Anyway, all this talk of distance between bodies when all I want is to get these heavenly bodies,” Lance pointed between the four of them, “In motion on the dance floor. Penthouse please,” he added, turning the alien elevator operator dressed in a tradition operator suit.

“You timed that,” sniggered Pidge as the doors shut and the elevator began to move upwards.

*******

“Woohoohoo!” cheered Pidge, running into the Penthouse suite and taking the steps two at a time down into the sunken living room. “This place is so cool!”

“Uno, dos, tres, quatros rooms,” said Lance, pointing to the doors along the East and West facing walls. “Mine may appear to be the biggest, but that is an optical illusion created by the hot tub and floating waterfall. It is the same size as the rest of yours and even if it was bigger, that’s fine because it’s my birthday.”

“We should make a pillow fort right here!” cheered Pidge.

“On it!” agreed Hunk.

“That’s the spirit,” cheered Lance, “Now where is that bellhop with our other bags?” Hunk and Pidge had come prepared, stepping through their wormholes with luggage packed. Keith however…

“I didn’t bring anything,” mumbled Keith.

“As usual you are ill prepared,” said Lance with a dismissive wave of his hand. “It’s cool. I got you bro.”

Lance scooped his arm through Keith’s and led him to the doors on the East facing wall. So it was going to be a touchy feely Lance today? That wasn’t going to make Keith’s gay looks any easier to conceal.

“Don’t tell me you went shopping for me,” groaned Keith. 

Lance threw open the bedroom door to reveal several outfits laid out on the bed and sang, “I went shopping!”

Keith groaned.

“I knew you wouldn’t have packed because you weren’t expecting to come,” said Lance then he looked at Keith seriously, “Why was that exactly? We should get into that now. Clear the air.”

Keith’s eyes widened and then in a comically loud voice he announced, “Boy! These clothes look great!”

“I thought as much,” said Lance with a cool smile and a nod. He turned to exit as Keith stepped inside to examine what Lance had got him. Which reminded him…

“I didn’t get you a present,” Keith, calling back over his shoulder.

“What else is new?” Lance called back. “Anyway your presence is your present. But also…” Lance poked his head back in the room. “Gift cards are a great present and available in the hotel store in the lobby.” Then he winked and fluttered back out of sight.

Touchy and winky. Please Lance… The fake flirting was way more than Keith could handle on short notice.

Then Keith’s eyes fell on an alarming piece of clothing. “Lance… why did you get me a bathing suit?”

“I forgot the best part!” came Lance’s voice from deep in the suite, “The hotel has eight different pools plus waterslides! Nothing says It’s Earth! like a waterslide!”

“Is your gay ass going to be able to handle the sight of Lance in a bathing suit?” 

Keith jumped, startled by the sound of Pidge’s voice directly behind him. He hadn’t heard them come in. He turned around to see Pidge dressed in their swim trunks.

“Yes,” hissed Keith, going to work removing his Blade suit. It’s not like Pidge would care if he undressed in front of them. Neither of them had anything the other was interested in seeing. “And don’t make jokes like this in front of him.”

Pidge turned to the side to give Keith at least a little semblance of privacy as he switched to the swim trunks. “I’ve made it through four of these birthday extravaganzas without going ‘oh, by the way, Lance, Keith has a dildo back home he named after you, but he’s looking to upgrade to the real thing’ and I’m not going to slip and say it now.”

“Ew. Why do you have to put it that way? Why can’t you just say I’m in love with him?”

“Ew love,” said Pidge, like it was a bad taste in their mouth.

“Ew love what?” asked Lance, appearing in the doorway and causing Keith to quickly yank up his shorts. “Ew love what?” he repeated when neither answered him.

“Ew to love in general,” said Pidge, casually. Lance’s eyes flicked away from Keith and fell on Pidge’s bare chest. “Oh… so now you just…?”

“What?” asked Pidge, challenging Lance to say something that would lead to him getting an earful on the sexism surrounding the afab nipple.

“Well, the pool is swimsuit optional,” said Lance, slowly, “I just didn’t think you’d take that option with your top half.”

“So is Keith,” shot Pidge, quickly, “And his tits are twice the size of mine.”

Lance immediately looked at Keith and Keith immediately brought his arms up to cover his pecs. 

Why Keith?

Why react that way?

“He does got dem tiddies,” said Lance, a wicked grin crossing his face.

“Maybe you should’ve gotten him a sports bra,” suggested Pidge.

“They’re just pecs, not tits!” barked Keith.

“That’s a mood,” agreed Pidge.

“Hey, what’s the shouting about?” asked Hunk, stepping into the doorway in his own swim trunks.

Lance looked directly at Hunk’s nipples with a thoughtful expression then turned to point at Pidge and Keith in turn. “A cup, B cup,” then back to Hunk, “Double D’s!”

“So uh… you three drunk already or something?” asked Hunk, looking a bit lost.

“Can I motorboat them?” asked Lance, still looking at Hunk's chest.

“No, it tickled too much last time,” said Hunk turning away.

“But later when I’m drunk?”

Hunk giggled. “We’ll see…”

“You da best,” said Lance, blowing Hunk a kiss... and aiming it at his chest then he spun on his heels and exited. “Pool in five, aceres!”

Keith gulped as he had just seen that bathrobe hem fly up when Lance spun around and gotten a definite answer to the question: is he naked under there?

Pidge leaned into Keith and muttered, “Oh, your gay ass is going down!”

********

Nipple gate shouldn’t have even been a thing, it’s not like Pidge could tell the gender of most of the aliens in the pool area and half of them had optioned out of wearing a swimsuit. It seemed like modesty (particularly gendered modesty) was more of a human trait than anything else.

Lance had gotten them a private cabana to relax in. Pidge had gone on every waterslide twice before deciding to give their legs a rest from climbing all those dang stairs. Keith retreated to the cabana shortly after in a huff, his face a blushing mess.

“Well?” asked Pidge, expecting the incident report.

“It’s like he’s following me,” grumbled Keith, “Every pool I move to, he’s there!”

“Of course he’s following you. It’s Lance. He’s always acted like you’re attached at the hip.”

“It’s too much this time,” said Keith, dropping down onto the lounge chair next to Pidge.

“That’s kinda Lance’s whole deal though. Being too much.”

“He has no tan lines,” said Keith, lying down on the lounge and pressing the heels of his hands into his eye sockets.

“See, that’s messed up,” said Pidge, “That means he tans in the nude. Do you think he did that just for this trip?”

Keith shrugged. He switched to massaging his own temples.

“I guess this is how he’s topping himself this year, making a greater spectacle of himself. Getting us to look at him naked.”

“Why would he do that?” asked Keith. Boy, he was clueless sometimes. Well, most of the time.

“He likes the reaction. The attention.”

“We’re giving him all our attention already,” moaned Keith, “That’s what these parties are for. Plus he’s an intergalactic celebrity. How is he not attentioned-out?”

“It’s Lance. No attention is ever enough. Plus, he likes yours especially.”

Keith’s face had just re-paled, but this made him blush again. “He likes it from all three of us.”

“Yes, but you give the best reaction. Hey,” said Pidge, spinning on their seat so they could reach out and grab Keith’s hand. “If you need an out or an excuse to retreat to the room at any point, let me know. I got you.”

“Thanks,” said Keith, giving Pidge’s hand a squeeze, “but I’ll survive. I’m gayest at the start. I’ll adjust.”

“By adjust, I know you mean ‘get drunk’ but I’ll help you with that too.”

“Heh. I know you will.”

Pidge sucked in breath and then went for it because they had to at least once a year. “You could just tell him how you f-“

“He’s straight, Pidge,” said Keith, snatching back his hand.

“The guy I just watched mix tanning oil with body glitter is straight?”

“Those stereotypes aren’t true, Pidge. Look at me. Lance hasn’t even figured out that I’m gay.”

“’kay there’s no way that boy thinks you’re straight. Not with all those doe-eyed looks you give him.”

“HEY KEITH!” yelled Lance, because of course he was paddling around in the pool directly in front of them. “THAT LADY OVER THERE THINKS YOU’RE CUTE! I GAVE HER YOUR INFO. THAT’S COOL, RIGHT?”

Keith gave Pidge the side eye.

“I stand corrected,” admitted Pidge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be continued... Another chapter coming soon!


	10. Day Twenty-Eight (cont'd): Birthday aka Part Two of Countdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 4663  
> Summary: Another year, another ridiculously lavish birthday trip where Lance seems set on showing off how rich, famous, and fabulous he is to this three closest friends. Another trip Keith's gay-ass might not survive.  
> Additional Tags: Post-canon, Blade Keith, Actor Lance, Pining Keith, Gay Disaster Keith, eventual smut

“AJ?” said Lance quietly as he breaststroked his way over to the edge of the pool. In response he heard the three tone melody to indicate the connection. 

“Yes, Mr. McClain?” responded AJ directly in his ear. 

“Do you have eyes?” asked Lance, grabbing onto the pool’s edge then laying his crossed arms on the concrete to float there. 

“I have eyes on you and your two companions in the cabana, sir.”

“Where are you?” asked Lance, pushing himself up a couple more inches out of the water so he could peer around. 

“I am camouflaged among the guests, sir. Hidden in plain sight.”

“Good,” said Lance, a little put off that he couldn’t spot him, but that meant his friends wouldn’t notice him either. “I want you heard and not seen.”

“I will work behind the scenes just as we discussed,” assured AJ. “I will ensure this weekend goes off without a hitch while working invisibly. Like the wind moving the leaves among the tree branches.”

“Nothing against you, man. I just don’t want my friends to think I’m all hoity-toity with an assistant. They don’t live the same lifestyle as me. They’re down to Earth people.”

“They are from Earth, sir.”

“No, it's an expression it means.., you know what, nevermind. Send drinks to the cabana. And food. Then more drinks after that. Just keep it coming all day.”

“I already set a schedule with the serving staff and kitchen. They should be receiving their first drinks shortly.”

“That’s not quick enough. As soon as anyone sits today, they should be handed a drink.”

“I will make that clear from now on, sir.”

Lance looked over at the cabana to see Keith and Pidge talking, pausing only to select drinks from the staff members appearing with a tray (finally.) 

“I wonder what they’re talking about…”

“I am not within heading range,” said AJ. “Would you like me to move closer? Within earshot?”

“No!” said Lance, quickly, “I do not want you eavesdropping on my friends’ conversations. That is one of the lines we agreed would not be crossed.”

“Forgive me for suggesting.”

“That said… if you just happen to overhear anything, it would be fine if you reported it to me. Particularly anything Keith says. He is hard to read.”

“You’ve mentioned his inscrutability, sir.”

“So if you hear or notice anything…”

“I’ll have a written report for you on Keith by tomorrow afternoon.”

“Perfect. Also, Keith didn’t seem pleased with the outfits I bought him. Can you pick up a few more outfits as options for tonight? What is the bar’s dress code anyway?”

“The website lists it as ‘festive cool ranch Doritos,’” replied AJ. 

“What does that mean?” questioned Lance. 

“I assumed you would know. I’ll make a few calls and find out. Once I know I’ll have the hotel staff bring up appropriate outfits for you and your three guests.”

“Great. That’s it for n -”Lance began his sign off command that would automatically end the bluetooth call.

“A couple more things while I have you on the line, sir.”

“Yes,” sighed Lance, having a feeling this would be about work. 

“Your agent called -“

“Tell them I’m not looking at offers this weekend.”

“I’ll pass that message on and book something for next week. The second item is, will you be looking to book a ‘companion’ on this trip? I have names of several highly rated discrete professionals in our area. I’ve put two on call just in case.”

Lance blushed. “Cancel that. Lose the names.”

“But sir -“

“I know this is your first birthday with me, Ajeg - Can I call you, Ajeg? - but I don’t do that stuff when I’m with my friends.”

“Affirmative to both, Sir.”

“That’s all for now,” muttered Lance. He listened to the three tone melody announce the end of the call in his waterproof, nearly invisible earpiece.

***********

Okay, the drinks at this resort were yummy. Pidge was definitely enjoying this vacay despite the gay crisis in the lounge chair beside them. 

“Is Kosmo not joining you this year?” they asked.

“Don’t invoke his name!” said Keith, leaning forward and frantically waving his arms.  
“Why not?”  
ZAP!  
SPLASH!  
They turned just in time to get a face full of pool water. The result of a tidal wave created by Kosmo teleporting above the pool then crashing down into the water. Pidge only realized this when they wiped the water from their eyes to the sound of screaming and saw Kosmo doggy paddling around the pool where the water level had gone down several feet.  
“You summoned him,” groaned Keith, dropping his dripping wet face into his palms. “Now I need to babysit a two tonne cosmic wolf at the same time I’m fending off my feelings for Lance.”  
“Heeeey buddy!” called out Lance (right on cue.) Pidge looked to see Lance had resurfaced in the water (so were others, swimming back to the surface and quickly swimming to the ladders to get the fuck out of there.) Lance instead swam right up to Kosmo, taking handfuls of fur in each hand so he could pull himself into a hug against his back.  
ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP ZAP!

Kosmo teleported around the pool, onto the deck, back into the pool, and then out of sight, all the while with Lance holding on for dear life on his back.

“Where’d they go?” asked Pidge.

“Uh oh…,” said Keith.

In the distance they could hear more ZAP’s and screams. Apparently Kosmo was touring the whole of the resort.

ZAP!

He teleported back above the pool with Lance still in tow and they once more dropped down into the water.

Keith and Pidge were hit with a second wave. Pidge could hear Lance laughing. It was so free and genuine. The first time on this trip Pidge felt like Lance wasn’t putting on a fabulous front.

Pidge looked over at Keith and saw the look of absolute adoration on his face as he watched his forever crush frolic with his animal familiar. He was too transparent sometimes. 

“You wanna quiet down the gay,” suggested Pidge.

“Right,” said Keith, shaking his head. “Sorry.”

“Hey! Excuse me!” said the resort Concierge, speeding walking up to the edge of the pool. “There are no pets allowed here!”

“Kosmo isn’t a pet,” grumbled Keith. He looked like he was about to go give the Concierge a piece of his mind, but Pidge threw out an arm to stop him.

“Let Lance field this,” they said.

Lance had already paddled to the edge of the pool and was speaking to the Concierge in a volume they couldn’t quite make out, though the word “cele-bri-tay” did rise above the sound of Kosmo panting as he swam laps around the pool.

“Yes, my apologies sir,” said the Concierge, giving a bow and walking off.

“Of course he’s allowed to do whatever the fuck he wants,” muttered Pidge.

“He wouldn’t have picked this place if he couldn’t.”

“It’s not just here though. Anywhere he goes he’s treated like the friggin’ Altean messiah. It’s not healthy for him.”

“Beg to differ,” said Keith. “Lance is happy like this. This is the kind of validation he was missing in his life.”

Pidge turned to look Keith in the eye. “It’s a show, Keith. Lance has always tried to look happy when he’s suffering. Don’t you think this is a cry for help? You know him best.”

Keith looked away from Pidge’s gaze. “I haven’t known Lance in a very long time. If I ever knew him…”

“Cue self-pitying answer.”

“Hush you,” said Keith, settling back. “I’m not supposed to be here.”

“Oh? Do I get to hear the reason?”

“My therapist thinks if I want to get over Lance I need to quit him cold turkey.”

“Pfft. That’s not what your therapist actually said. Your therapist said skipping the party would be avoidance and that isn’t healthy. What you need is to work on setting boundaries with Lance.”

Keith dead ass stared at Pidge. “Have you been speaking to my therapist?”

So it was true. “No, you told Krolia who told Colleen who told me.”

“Dammit Krolia,” muttered Keith. “Pidge, I thought your therapist told you your energy would be better used concerning yourself with your own well being and not your friends? You have enough emotional baggage to carry without carrying everyone else’s.”

“How did you - ?”

“You told Colleen who told Krolia who told me. Mom gossip chain works both ways. Also, heard that your mom is concerned you haven’t found a boyfriend yet.”

“Ha!” Pidge nearly choked on the laugh. “Heard your mom’s worried about the same.”

“You thinkin’ what I’m thinkin’?” drawled Keith.

“Sham wedding pact to get our moms off our back if we reach a certain age and you’re still single?”

“You mean if we’re still both single?”

“Keith…,” sighed Pidge.

“Hey, what am I missing?” asked Lance, appearing at the entrance to the cabana. Thank the Ancients he’d grabbed a towel to wrap around his waist after climbing out of the pool or Keith might’ve imploded.

“We just got engaged,” said Pidge, grinning.

“WHAT?!” shrieked Lance, “You can’t just – you don’t even – where the quiznak is this coming from?!”

“Pidge is joking,” said Keith, clearly.

“Good,” said Lance, relaxing. “I mean, not good. I wish you two the best –separately – I just don’t like to be blindsided by these things. I want to see it coming a mile away.” Lance sat himself down on the end of Keith’s lounge chair, his tiny towel bunching up over tanned thighs. His gaze was focused on Pidge as he continued to babble about whatever control he wanted to impose over the relationships between his friends as he casually (but on purpose) let his hand fall on Keith’s ankle and gave it a light squeeze.

Poor Keith looked as gay and trapped as ever.

Pidge saw this happen and felt bad for him. Keith was an idiot thinking Lance didn’t know he was gay and in love with him. These weekends were about Lance soaking up the attention and no one gave him better attention than Keith.

Suddenly Pidge understood why Keith thought it would be best if he didn’t come at all. He was never going to be capable of creating boundaries with Lance. Lance would advance on Keith until there wasn’t an inch left and Pidge wasn’t entirely sure what Lance would do next. Most likely continue to string Keith along, never letting him get over him.

But then again, what did Pidge know? Their therapist said they tend to catastrophize situations in their mind. Thinking up the worst possible scenario and believing it’s the only way things could play out. You’d think surviving the near end to all reality would mean smooth mental sailing from now on, but naw. That kinda trauma before you’re old enough to drive sets up a pattern for anticipating the worst.

ZAP!

They all turned to see Kosmo had left the pool, the displaced water rushing into the middle to fill the void he’d left. There was a scream off in the distance so Pidge could only assume Kosmo was still on the property.

“Great,” mumbled Keith. “I’m going to have to track him down and send him off.”

He went to get up, but Lance’s hand clamped down on Keith’s calve. Really Lance?

“Let him have fun,” said Lance, “The staff is going to keep an eye on him. It’s great that he’s here.”

“He’s going to break shit. Expensive shit.”

“None of that matters,” said Lance, with a dismissive wave of his hand.

“Does your cele-bri-tay pay to fix property damage?” asked Keith, sounding irritated.

“If anything’s for reals broken, I’ll for reals pay for it,” said Lance, tone light. Meanwhile his hand was sliding up to Keith’s knee. “You’re my guest and by extension so is Kosmo. Nothing is going to prevent this from being the perfect birthday so don’t sweat it.”

Keith was staring at Lance’s hand on his knee and most definitely sweating.

“Hey-o!” came Hunk’s bubbly voice, breaking up the sexual tension as he ducked himself back into the cabana. Behind him were a pair of servers carrying trays of covered food. 

“There you are,” said Pidge. “I thought you were swimming, but you’re not even wet.”

“Oh yeah, no,” said Hunk, scratching behind his head. “I was planning to, but then I took a tiny peek at the menu and realized it was all wrong.”

“How can a menu be wrong?”

“Well,” said Hunk, stepping to the side so those servers could exit while another entered with a tray of fresh cocktails. “This resort is supposed to be Earth themed, but none of the food was right. Mac and Bees, Chicken Stringers, French Lies…” Hunk counted these off on his fingers as he went.

“Wait, French LIES?” gasped Lance.

“Yeah, it was like alphabet soup that spells out untrue facts in french.”

They all stared at Hunk, drinks frozen part way to their mouths. 

“WAIT, IS THE MAC AND BEES THING LITERAL TOO?!” cried Lance.

“Not anymore,” said Hunk, pulling the lids off two of the trays. Pidge wasn’t even hungry until they smelt that smell. Suddenly they were salivating as Hunk uncovered the rest of the trays.

“Hunk, you beautiful genius,” said Lance, already biting into a Mac and Cheese Ball. “Ohmygod,” he mumbled around his bite. “Do not tell my Dietitian about this.”

“You have a Dietitian?” asked Keith.

“We can’t all clock a hundred plus hours of Blade Mission a week and earn washboard abs like some people,” teased Lance as he laid his hand flat on Keith’s bare stomach. Pidge watched the look of panic cross Keith’s face. This was probably as close as Lance had ever gotten to Keith’s joystick.

“Harder than I thought,” mused Lance. He definitely meant the ab muscles, but Keith blushed like he meant his dick. “I could literally grate cheese on this… Wait!” Lance leant over and grabbed a block of cheese off one of the trays that featured a charcuterie platter then used it to mime grating cheese off Keith’s abs.

“We have graters in the kitchen,” said Hunk, quickly. “Way more effective than Keith’s abs.”

Lance shrugged and twisted back to look at Hunk and Pidge. Eyes off, Keith was able to silently freakout behind Lance’s back. 

“So you’ve been working in the kitchen this whole time?” asked Pidge, pressing Hunk.

“Well… they’re kinda understaffed and I thought I could help out.”

Typical co-dependent Hunk can’t relax. Always needs to find a way to be needed. Cooking is his go-to. Personally, Pidge wouldn’t have minded trying some Mac and Bees… Maybe the bees on this planet are hella tasty and not endangered.

“Hunk, you don’t need to cook here,” said Lance. “Full service is part of the cost.”

“But none of us are paying anything,” said Keith.

“Zip it,” said Lance, wiping his hand back to push an intrusive finger to Keith’s lips without even turning back himself. Keith went crossed-eyed looking at that finger pressed to his lips. 

Pidge needed to make a drinking game over how much of Keith could Lance touch. Everytime he hits an androgynous zone, take a shot! They were going to get so drunk…

“We’re here to spend time together,” said Lance, sounding actually sincere for once. “So let’s stay together. Let's do some waterslides,” suggested Lance, standing up.

“I’m down,” said Pidge then they watched as Lance just let that towel drop. 

***

Hunk immediately looked away when Lance dropped his towel. This whole bathing suit optional thing was way too awkward.

“Dude, no one wants to go on a waterslide with you while you’re hanging brain,” said Pidge. “I don’t need to see what happens to that floppy thing when G Force is applied.”

“Rude,” scoffed Lance, pouting. “Y’all need to give up on human hang-ups on nudity. Tons of naked aliens here.”

“Says the guy who flipped over my nipples earlier! Besides, most of the aliens have fur and you… well, you don’t anymore. Not where it counts. Cover up or we’re not sliding. We’re united in this, right guys?”

“Uhhh,” mumbled Hunk, trying not to actually have to say anything to Lance.

“Whatever,” muttered Keith, also keeping his eyes away from Lance.

“Fine. I’ll wear a bathing suit if that’s what you squares want,” said Lance, dramatically. He spun around, put a hand to his ear and mumbled something Hunk couldn’t quite catch. Then Lance threw out his arm and before Hunk could figure out what that gesture meant there was a distant THUNK and Lance caught something blue in his hand.

“Whoa,” gasped Hunk, “did you just have a napkin shot at you from a t-shirt cannon?”

“Napkin?” repeated Lance, flipping around and unraveling the piece of fabric in his hand. “Oh no, this is my bathing suit.”

“That’s a thong!” barked Pidge, “A thong is not an improvement!”

“You wanted my balls and dick covered!” argued Lance, “It takes care of that!”

“But your entire ass is going to be hanging out and Kei –” Pidge cut themselves off so fast.

“What about Keith?” asked Lance, finishing the name himself and whipping his head to look at Keith. Keith was looking at the ground, but the attention made his eyes widen in horror.

“Is jealous you gave him trunks instead of a thong and it wouldn’t be fair to wear that around him,” explained Pidge in a voice that sounded louder than the tone called for.

“I can get Keith his own thong,” said Lance is his all too helpful voice. He spun around again and put his hand to his ear when Keith finally spoke up.

“I don’t need a thong! Just wear something with an ass so the slides don’t chaff you.”

“Right…” Lance blinked at Keith then turned his back again and stepped away. He again said something quietly to himself then held out his hand. THUNK He’d caught something new from what had to be a t-shirt cannon though Hunk couldn’t spot the source from here.

“That’s panties!” barked Pidge, pointing at the rhinestone-covered garment in Lance’s hand.

“Honestly, you of all people gendering clothing…,” muttered Lance as he bent forward to slip a leg into the pair of sheer looking shorty short shorts.

“My point is it’s not better than a thong. It’s underwear.”

Lance pulled the garment all the way up with a poignant snap of the waistband. “It’s my back-up suit and it’s opaque and covers my ass cheeks… Well, most of my ass cheeks. Need to give the girls some breathing room.”

“It’s flesh coloured,” said Pidge, looking at Lance’s crotch.

Lance rolled his eyes. “Yeah, but not my flesh. You can tell I’m wearing something. Keith, can’t you tell I’m wearing something?”

“I see… sparkles,” said Keith, slowly. At least he was looking in Lance’s direction again and that was an improvement.

“You guys don’t understand fashion at all,” bemoaned Lance. “I’m wearing this, y’all are gonna get into it, now let’s go because those waterslides aren’t going to ride themselves!”

He was halfway out the Cabana when Hunk said, “Wait, what about all this food?” He’d spent hours preparing it and they barely touched it except for Pidge who was stuffing their cheeks with bacon wrapped scallops.

“I’ll have the staff take care of it,” said Lance, all casual.

Take care of it how? Hunk didn’t want to voice this concern out loud. They were having a nice vacay together, right? Everyone was happy and positive. No reason to complain… about hours of wasted labour that was not appreciated.

Or maybe it was! His friends just weren’t always very vocal with their compliments which is why Hunk prefers to watch them eat, but apparently they were all going to go watersliding instead. Oh well!

***********

“Single riders only,” warned the alien lifeguard. He was sporting three different kinds of swim trunks, stacked up his long torso and torn open in the bottom on the top two. He said this because it was Keith’s turn to go, but Lance had crossed the yellow line right after him... mere inches behind Keith... body heat radiating forward against his back...

“You must be new here,” said Lance, voice light, almost a laugh, but not quite.

“Everyone’s new here. This is a new resort.”

“Okay, then I understand the confusion. See, I’m Lance McClain.”

The alien just stared.

“Former Paladin of Voltron.”

Like the rest of them weren’t also.

“Doesn’t sound familiar,” said the lifeguard, flatly.

“The war wasn’t that long ago,” muttered Lance, under his breath. Then he pressed a finger to his ear and said something Keith couldn’t make out.

“Can I go?” asked Keith, foot reaching out to touch the water rushing from the jets at the top of the slide. Lance grabbed his arm to stop him. He didn’t explain, just grippedKeith so he couldn’t leave. “What are we - ?”

The bright red phone that was hanging on the guardrail behind the lifeguard rang. He picked it up. Keith already knew what the result of this call would be before he even said, “Ya- huh?”

*******

‘Anytime I need to see your face  
I just close my eyes  
And I am taken to a place  
Where your crystal mind and magenta feelings  
Take up shelter in the base of my spine  
Sweet like a chic-a-cherry cola’

A minute later Keith was listening to 90’s pop-rock blast over the resort speakers while riding down the slide, not just with Lance’s thighs gripped around his hips, but with Hunk acting as his little spoon and Pidge bringing up the rear.

The amount of things Lance could get, or rules he could break, just by asking wass staggering, but right in that moment, with Lance’s arms wrapped around his middle and his other two best friends cheering as they whipped down the slide, Keith managed not to care about all that.

This could’ve been what a date would be like with Lance. Bathing suits and the smell of chlorine and skin contact…

‘I don't need to try to explain  
I just hold on tight  
And if it happens again  
I may move so slightly  
To the arms and the lips and the face  
Of the human cannonball that  
I need to, I want to’

Lance tucked his chin against Keith’s neck. He was laughing right in his ear. It was an honest laugh like before when he was playing with Kosmo, there was no showboating here. It made Keith really happy he came.

“Everyone plug your nose!” warned Hunk as they were approaching the bottom of the slide. Then suddenly Hunk screamed which confused Keith because his brain didn’t fully register the ZAP sound that came right before. 

Then Hunk collided with something that had a domino effect of making them each smash into each other and that’s Keith saw the blue fur and realized Kosmo teleported to the front of the line and they were still about to hit the bottom!

SPLASH!

Kosmo hit the water so hard it dislodged it so it splashed over the sides of the pool. They didn’t land in water, but on top of wet comic fur in a painful jumble of limbs before sliding off to fall into the now shin deep water.

Keith couldn’t stop laughing while he sat on his butt in the tiny amount of water that was still left.

“Again?” asked Lance, standing and offering a hand to Keith. He took it. It felt cold and wet and familiar.

“Definitely,” said Keith, letting Lance help him stand.

Instead of letting go, Lance held on and scooped that arm over his shoulders. “See how much fun you’re having. This is why I forced you to come. I know what’s best for you, Mullet.”

*********

Keith sighed, looking up at the clear blue sky. The shade so much like Earth’s sky that always reminded him of Lance’s eyes. 

They’d lucked out on the weather. It was hot, but floating on an inner tube on the lazy river meant enough contact with the water to keep his body temp just right.

Everyone had fallen silent, relaxing as they floated along as a group. He couldn’t hear any screaming in the distance which meant Kosmo must’ve found somewhere to nap. Keith was ready to fall asleep himself. He could really get used to this…

“Make room.”

Then as soon as Keith’s eyes were closed, Lance climbed into his lap!

Or at least he tried to, sending the side of the inner tube underwater and putting Keith off balance.

“Lance! What are you doing?” barked Keith as Lance continued to hop and push down on the side of the innertube until he was successful in crawling, all slippery limbed on top of Keith.

“My inner tube is leaking air. I was going to sink.”

“We’re going to sink!”

“It can hold us both,” said Lance, flipping his body over as the tube continued to rock unsteadily in the water. Much to the amusement of Hunk and Pidge watching.

“You need to ask to share!” argued Keith, giving up as Lance settled his ass into Keith’s lap, crisscrossing their bodies like an X.

“Oh, but Keith, what’s mine is yours. Haven’t you learned?”

“Yeah, first Red and now that inner tube,” said Pidge, sarcastically.

“Paladins of the rubber,” added Hunk.

“You should just swim beside us or float if that big ego of yours doesn’t weigh you down.”

“Gross, Keith, kids pee in this water,” said Lance, resettling himself which meant shimmying his ass on Keith’s lap. At least what he was saying was unsexy enough for Keith could control himself, but his peace and relaxing was definitely over.

“Ohhh right on time,” said Lance, rolling to his side, making the tube unsteady AGAIN so he could grab a drink off a tray of beverages floating by on a mini raft. Where did that even come from? “Here you go, my dear,” said Lance, nudging a drink into Keith’s hand. “You seem like you could relax a little more.”

“I was relaxing just fine until your bony butt climbed in here!” Disclaimer: It was not bony. It was perfect.

“BONY?!” cried Lance, deeply offended. “It is not! Look at this!” With that Lance rolled over, landing him lying face down across Keith’s legs… for about a moment, before he slipped right off and slid into the water with a surprised whimper.

“Anyone catch that ass before he went under?”

“Yeah, looked bony,” snorted Keith as Lance broke the surface.

“You okay?” asked Hunk, the only one not enjoying Lance ending up in the drink.

“Not everyone can have a battle earned bubble butt, Keith! Some of us have to go to personal trainers!”

“You know my job isn’t a workout routine, right?” asked Keith.

“Just let me back on,” said Lance.

“No!” said Keith, kicking his legs so hard that not only did he propel away, but splashed water into Lance’s freckled face.

**********

“Ajeg, did you get our outfits for tonight, yet?” asked Lance while he towel dried his hair. The others were walking back to the cabana so Lance was far enough off to make a discreet call to his personal assistant on his earpiece

“Just laying them out on your beds, sir.”

“Pick mine back up, I need it tailored to really hug my Easter basket if you catch my drift.”

“I do not, sir.”

“Talkin’ ‘bout my buttered rolls.”

“Your what?”

“My downstairs pears.”

“Sir, I’m sorry I don’t -”

“My ass, AJ, I want my pants to hug my ass.”

“Affirmative, sir.”

“That’s all for now,” said Lance, dropping his finger from his ear. He looked at his countdown watch. Five hours to go. S’okay… he could pull this birthday off just like the rest of them. It would be perfect. As always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song is I Want You by Savage Garden
> 
> That's all I have written so far! When I continue it I think I'll move it to it's own fic??? What do you y'all think??


	11. Day Thirty-One: Free Day aka Uniform

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Explicit  
> Wordcount: 1922  
> Summary: Lance shows up for a meeting with a wrinkled uniform, but Keith can't have his sub looking sloppy so it's time for punishment.  
> Additional Tags: Canonverse season 8, non-canon compliant, spanking, anal fingering, Dom Keith, Sub Lance, Bottom Lance
> 
> Song: All the Good Girls go to Hell by FILV
> 
> "Pearly gates look more like a picket fence  
> Once you get inside's  
> Got friends but can't invite them"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adapted from a Twitter thread for #BottomLanceWeek
> 
> Thank you to @Devoosha for beta'ing! Check out her stuff!

"Your uniform is mussed."

"It's fine," says Lance, smoothing out the front which does nothing to remove the wrinkles that have made their home in the jacket.

"It's not fine. It's sloppy," says Keith, his tone serious. "And when you look bad, it reflects poorly on me." Keith steps close to Lance. Very close. "... as your leader," he adds.

"Keith," warns Lance, his voice breathy, "we have a hallway full of alien diplomats out there. We can't get into *this* now."

"You should've thought of that when you skipped ironing your uniform this morning." Keith can picture it in his head, how good Lance looks with that blue and white jacket freshly pressed.

"Okay, I'm sorry," says Lance, "now we can we..." he nods his head towards the door.

Keith hooks his fingers through Lance's belt. "Are you trying to get out of punishment?" asks Keith, tone even, but his fingers squeeze just a bit tighter on that belt.

"I'm... trying to defer punishment," says Lance, eyes darting to the door. He hasn't fully accepted this yet.

"The meeting will start late," says Keith. "It'll be your fault," he continues, "and the longer you resist me, the later it will start."

Lance sighs, his shoulders slumping in that wrinkled jacket. Keith needs this and so does Lance. He'll come to accept that once they get started.

Keith undoes Lance's belt. He slides it off in one fluid motion, snapping it to the side. Lance, to his credit, doesn't flinch, but his brows pinch together with concern as his eyes follow the path of the belt until Keith sets it aside on the table of the meeting room.

Keith won't use it on him... unless he needs him too.

Dampening his anticipation, Keith casually twists a chair around so it faces out from the table. He sits, looks up at Lance, and says, "Well?"

Lance goes to shrug off his jacket.

"Leave it," says Keith, quickly. "To remember why you deserve this." Keith spreads his legs open. Lance undoes his fly, slides his pants and underwear down past his hips.

It's automatic now, their routine, their positioning, how Lance lays his chest across one knee, the top of his thigh on his other. But Keith sees the blush that still rises in Lance's cheeks (both sets) and he still gets this overwhelming sense of gratitude that he gets to have this. That Lance obeys him at his word. That someone he adores so deeply is his, in his way.

Bends to his will. Bends over his knee.

Keith removes his gloves. Lance readjusts over his lap, a small whine in his throat. Impatient. But Keith's in no rush. Lance is still thinking about the meeting. Still thinking about the aliens waiting for them to open that door. Still thinking about duty. How Allura and Shiro trust them to lead this one.

Responsibility. 

But they have a responsibility to each other. Lance to Keith, and Keith to Lance. This is theirs and it takes precedent always.

Keith smooths his palm of the crest Lance's ass. Marvels, as always at the smoothness of his skin, of the freckles he has even here. Does Lance have any inkling of how gorgeous he is?

Of course Keith won't tell him now. Not when he's punishing him.

Later. When he's paid his debt in full.

Keith goes from gently running his hand over Lance's ass to giving it a smack. Lance cries out in surprise.

"Shh," scolds Keith, tapping him again, but with less force. "They'll hear you outside."

"You're making noise, too," grumbles Lance.

"One of us can control ourselves..."

"Okay, but you've met me, right? Control isn't my - AH!" Lance cries out again with another spank. There's an effort to stifle it off, but it comes too late.

Keith turns, looks over his shoulder, reaches out to retrieve the belt. Lance twists to look up and sees it. His eyes grow wide. He knows better than to say what he's thinking - 'that will be louder...'

He shouldn't worry. Keith understands limits. Lance should trust him with that - does trust him with that, it's just his brain gets ahead of him sometimes.

Keith folds the belt twice. "Open," he instructs.

Dutiful, Lance opens his mouth and Keith slots the folded belt inside. "Bite."

Lance bites.

"Hold that. If you drop it, I use it. Understand?"

Lance nods his agreement. It's not as fun when Lance is gagged because Keith doesn't get the satisfaction of shutting down his arguments.

Ah well. How can he be sad with Lance's beautiful ass right here.

Keith hooks his left hand around Lance's hip. A bit of leverage to hold him in place. As usual, Lance's right arm reaches back, his hand wrapping around Keith's wrist. It's that little piece of control Keith allows him to have; that connection when Keith can't see his face.

Lance is braced, he's held down, he's gagged, so Keith let's loose on him. He draws back his arm down to smack Lance's right cheek. He draws back quickly and smacks his left.

He likes to be even in his coverage so he goes back and forth like this. Right then left. SMACK SMACK.

Lance moans around the leather in his mouth. His grip tightens on Keith's wrist with every blow then relaxes as soon as Keith draws back.

Keith works him, not caring about the echo in the room from each satisfying spank. He watches the red bloom over Lance's ass cheeks, deepening in shade as he goes. He feels a nice sting in his hand, the level of the feeling helps him keep track of how far he's gone. How much more Lance can take.

He's not greedy. He gives exactly the punishment Lance deserves. No more. No less.

The shame of Lance's mistakes glows red on his ass. He pays his debt in the same colour as his lion.

Lance grips Keith's wrist tight. It doesn't release as Keith draws his arm back. Keith freezes like that. That's it. That's his signal to stop. Lance is at his limit and Keith nearly surpassed it. He quietly scolds himself for losing track. Now he owes Lance... something.

"So good," hums Keith, dancing light fingers over Lance's red ass. He winces just a little from the touch, his cheeks clenching. That won't do. "S'okay," he says, pulling back. "You did so well. I think you can have a treat now."

Lance's reply gets muffled by the belt in his mouth. Keith can see droplets of drool on the floor. He can also see drops of precum between his own legs... feel Lance's hardness hanging against his inner thigh.

Keith sucks his own index and middle fingers into his mouth. Coats them with saliva, then drags them between Lance's crack and teases them over his hole.

"This good?" he asks.

Lance uses the hand that has Keith's wrist and rubs gently against it. Their signal for yes. He wants it.

And he deserves it. Because he takes his punishment so well, right when he has to and not a minute later.

Keith teases him a moment, running those fingers over Lance's sensitive hole before indulging him and pushing them in. There's resistance, it's not a smooth entry but Lance doesn't shy away from rough, and Keith will oblige him in any kind of manhandling he likes.

Keith bends his head, spits, gets just a bit more lubricant. Just enough so he can do the work he needs to do. It is what he owes Lance so being so damn good, even if he's not perfect. 'He's perfect when he cums,' Keith thinks, because his brain often betrays him like that. Wants to skip ahead. Wants to spoil Lance. But no. It's a process. It's theirs.

Keith fingers Lance with quick thrusts, driving the pair of fingers in and out.

Lance's mouth is full, but his moans can be heard in his throat. It's so pretty, his pleasure.

"I'm gonna trust you," says Keith, pulling out his fingers so he can use his right to pull the belt out of Lance's mouth. His left hand stays clamped tight on his hip.

Lance nods and when Keith's fingers reenter him, his moans stay subdued.

He's being good. So good.

Until he isn't. Until Lance fights against the hand holding him in place and tries to push his hips back to take more of Keith's fingers.

"Settle," warns Keith, giving Lance a firm spank right in the middle of his ass this time.

"Please Keith..." Lance continues to squirm. "Please let me cum..."

Instead of penetrating Lance again with his fingers, Keith takes the pad of his thumb and circles it around Lance's little, red hole. 

"You wanna cum here? On the floor of Atlas's meeting room. Their nice. Clean. Floor." For each word he does a full rotation around his hole.

"Please, Keith, please. I'll clean it up. Just let me cum, please."

Keith bends his thumb at the knuckle, lets the very tip of his thumb flick over Lance's hole. Vibrates it there so Lance writhes with overstimulation while Keith holds firm to him and ponders his request.

"Please..." begs Lance again.

Really. Keith spoils him.

He dips his head down and spits. It collects at the top of Lance's crack and using his index and middle fingers, Keith slides it down and pushes effortlessly into Lance's stretched hole.

"Cum perfect," whispers Keith as he hooks his fingers, finding Lance's spot through muscle memory, pressing just the right amount before he withdraws, then returns to press again.

Keith knows this dance so well.

He tries to slow down the moment in his mind. Memorize all the tiny little things that happen as Lance comes.

The way his breath becomes erratic so that Keith can feel the inflation of his ribcage against his left thigh...

The way his hips stutter and rock involuntarily against his right.

The way his legs shoot out straight behind him, then collapse and fold, and...

And...

...and how he hisses Keith's name over and over as he cums so Keith's name becomes part of Lance's perfection as he clenches tight around his fingers...

Just perfect. Every damn time.

When Lance's body is spent, he becomes boneless, draped over Keith's lap.

Keith gives him a moment. Strokes his hair, feels the sweat collected there (he really did get overheated because Keith made him wear the jacket.)

"That was perfect," says Keith, quietly. "You took your punishment so nice and you came so perfect."

"Do you forgive me?" asks Lance, voice spent.

"Of course. But don't let it happen again."

Lance muffles a laugh. Keith's eyes narrow. He wonders sometimes if Lance makes these mistakes on purpose.

"Now, clean up the floor. I need to let the diplomats from Triforge Six in."

Keith puts on his gloves while Lance tidies up. His uniform is still wrinkled for the meeting (worse so now), but Lance uses his charms to outweigh his faults. Keith is very familiar with that trick of his.

When an agreement is reached, the meeting ends. Keith can finally leave. Can finally seek time alone to replay everything him and Lance had just done together in his head while he indulges in his own pleasure.

He cums hard, but not perfect. Nothing matches Lance's perfection in cumming.

But he's happy. Overall Lance did him proud today and his affection grows all that stronger.

At least until the next day when Lance's shoes are scuffed...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you waiting for more of Countdown, I'll make it a solo fic when I have another chapter to add so please subscribe to me as a user!
> 
> BBBKxoxox


	12. BONUS: Black (sequel to Blue)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: Teen  
> Wordcount: 782  
> Summary: On top of Black, watching the sunset, Keith and Lance finally talk about the kiss their shared when Keith left for the Blades.  
> Additional Tags: Canonverse, SUNSET SCENE, Second Kiss, unhappy ending... or is it?, Keith is so damn soft for Lance
> 
> Song: Black - Pearl Jam
> 
> "I know someday you'll have a beautiful life  
> I know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky, but why  
> Why, why can't it be, oh can't it be mine?"
> 
> Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yqLSWPzApwjWyQGKcx57D?si=LMheUiFVQ6mZlXgOH3Kk7A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought I was done, but then I remembered I'd meant to wrap up the story from the very first oneshot!!!!

_ “That’s why we’ve got to end this war and we’re gonna do it with the Lance that’s the Paladin of the Red Lion. The Lance that’s always got my back. And the Lance who knows exactly who he is and what he’s got to offer.”  _

*****************************************************************

“Thank you,” says Lance, glancing down and breaking eye contact. “For being so good about this. I was worried it would be awkward since last time we talked like this…”

“I kissed you?” offers Keith, finishing Lance’s thought.

Lance blushes deeper than he already was. “Uh, well, I think we kinda took turns doing that.”

Keith knows that. Can’t forget the feeling of Lance’s lips if he tried, but he’s trying to make things less awkward for Lance. “It’s okay. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t know if you’d come back thinking we would… at least I guess you didn’t seem to be expecting…”

“I was gone longer than I promised,” says Keith.

“That’s an understatement,” says Lance and as light as he tries to say it, Keith catches the bitter undertone.

“I’m sorry for that,” says Keith, looking out at the setting sun. “Every day I thought about you. About how I was failing to get back to you. And about how I - How much I missed you.”

“Well, now I feel worse,” says Lance with a chuckle that sounds forced.

“Don’t,” says Keith, “Thanks to my future visions I knew the wheels would be in motion for you and Allura to start before I got back.”

“Wait, really?”

“I made peace with it, Lance, because I want you to be in love. I care about your being happy.”

“Wow, that makes me feel real conflicted about my feelings,” says Lance, drawing his knees up to his chest.

Keith frowns. “I was avoiding talking about this. I didn’t want to make things hard for you.”

“It’s okay,” says Lance, “I’m glad we’re talking. I’m not changing my mind, I just…” He stops to think while Keith watches his pretty face, lit by the orange glow of the sunset, try to find the words. “I guess I just feel sad we never got that reunion kiss I thought we were going to share when you came back.”

Something stirs in Keith and he knows better than to follow through, but… will anything he does really change the future? Against his better judgement, he asks, “When do you and Allura become official?”

“Official?” repeats Lance.

“Like, when are you officially dating?”

“I don’t know, our date’s tonight so…”

“So should we say when the light disappears,” says Keith, nodding towards the dimming skyline, “you’re officially dating Allura?”

Lance’s eyebrows raise, understanding where Keith is going with this. He glances out at the horizon. “Better kiss me quick, Mullet.”

It’s all the permission Keith needs to cup Lance’s cheek and lean in to meet his lips.

Three years. It’s been nearly three years since he promised to kiss Lance again, but it’s just as sweet and tender as the last one. He knows it’s self-indulgent, that every kiss he’s ever shared with Lance is poorly timed, but it’s something to hold on to when the light disappears…

Even with his eyes closed, he notices the shift. The darkness that falls. They lean back at the same time.

“I should go get ready,” says Lance. He’s awkward and trips when he gets up.

Keith is worried he’ll pitch himself right off the side of Black if he tries to climb down in this state, especially in the dark so he says, “Kosmo can take you back.” 

Kosmo’s ears perk up at the sound of his name.

“You sure?” asks Lance.

“Yeah, it’ll give you time to change,” says Keith, looking down at Lance’s ridiculous outfit.

Lance blushes again. He’s so cute when he’s shy, Keith can’t stand it. Is nearly overwhelmed with the desire to kiss him again, but he knows he won’t act on it.

“Thanks, Keith. For everything,” says Lance before he ZAPs away with Kosmo.

“I’ll see you again soon,” says Keith, to the empty space where Lance once was.

Sunshine gone, there’s a chill that Keith ignores. Instead he lays down and watches the stars come out. For each one that appears he plays back one of his future memories:

_ The first time they say ‘I love you’ _

_ Their first date _

_ Their third kiss _

_ The day Lance agrees to marry him _

_ Their wedding _

_ Their kids _

_ Their kids’s kids _

_ Their great grandkids _

_ First dance _

_ First fight _

_ First… everything _

A full lifetime of memories. Everything yet to be experienced. It’ll be theirs. 

Keith will wait for it.

Lance is worth waiting years for.


End file.
